The Driver was distracted by Kinja’s Infinite Scroll and the 450 clicks it takes to read the comments

Gonna have to take the wife’s van to work now.....

Picture two swampy bodies pressed against each other, stewing in each other’s bodily horrors.

This man is doing the Lord’s work

You forgot step 5: “Verify bill is flat, crack open a 24 oz. Monster, and put on some Limp Bizkit.”

In the late 90's I watched a decent amount of races. From 2001-2016 I missed exactly 3 races live due to emergencies, which I then watched later. And I watched the vast majority of the truck and bush/nationwide series races. I’ve watched 3 races this season. I just can’t anymore. The constant rules changes... this…

Both look beige to me.

Kathy Ireland, man.

Kids these days don’t know what it’s like to have to work for it. THAT WAS OUR PORN UP THERE, MILLENNIALS

Relevant: Donald Trump or Raw Chicken?

“Black. Also apparently orange.” -Fernando Alonso

So Pepsi completely “stepped in it” with their tone-deaf ad, then United comes along and says... “amateurs... THIS is how you get your BRAND Message across.”

At least it was just a mattress. If anything bigger furniture wise, that accident would have been sofa king bad.

Honestly, I’m more bothered by the improper display of the flag. The field is always to the left of the viewer. http://www.ushistory.org/betsy/flagetiq.html