Pretty sure this post ended the life of my poor old phone.  You’ll be missed.

LOL.  I almost like Windy now.

Zsa zsa looks like a licker from one of the first two Resident Evil games.

If this idea doesn’t pan out I would pay to watch Ichiro eat cheeseburgers, though I’m not sure why.

(narrator voice): no, he can’t.

Pretry sure Bezos prefers the title, ”Richest Person Who Ever Lived.”

Skeletor is still funny. Lebron to Eternia.

That’s not at all how I imagined Thiel’s phone voice .

While I don’t care about any NBA team, I’m really impressed by the Deadspin trolling. “Here’s some pics of the GOAT (who lost again), guys!” I’m hoping that later there will be a post collecting these pictures and posting them side-by-side with photos of Ovechkin, a guy who certainly won’t be taking the Stanley Cup to…

I really like the idea that $29k fruit is a sign of a healthy economy.

The Deadspin staff gets a lot of shit for making the sort of predictions every other sports outlet makes, and, while it’s fair to say you give a lotta shit too, it’s awfully refreshing to see so many writers at one outlet owning those takes. I don’t care about hockey, yet read about it because some of you do. Thanks…

The delusional self importance is remarkable, as even a feud that resulted in both being shot into the sun would be barely noticed and forgotten in 36 hours.

Ditto on the raw onions and sardines with saltines. My grandfather’s late night snack was cornbread crumbled into a bowl of milk. He switched from filterless Camels to snuff after he lost a lung to cancer. I never saw him sniff it like my grandma did. Instead he used it like Skoal and spat periodically into old snuff…

Hmm. How about we say fuck this “sport” virtually no one on earth cares about?

Drew is so boned.

Just a little psychology...

Jesus. No one on Bumble will ever forget how Maya made them feel.

Or the Dems could draw from the 80 million who didn’t vote in 2016. Those nonvoters, according to Pew polls going back several decades, are predominantly to the left of center. I dunno if that would work, but it seems more probable than turning voters who fundamentally disagree with the party on every major issue.

But for the first time since the end of World War II, the neoliberals are out of power.

Bill Simmons could not be reached for comment because he was totally doin’ it like Michael Corleone and Apollonia Vitelli.