Ok, this may be hokey, but looking at Amy Schumer’s photo really did make me feel empowered and beautiful. My body doesn’t look so different from her body there, but when I’ve seen her in clothes she’s always seemed really beautiful, which makes me feel like all those mornings I’ve spent staring at myself thinking I…

Every so often I get the idea in my head I will work up my resistance to high heels so I buy a nice pair. Always ends the same though - me rubbing my toes staring at them from afar with a mix of resentment, pain, and slight adoration.

Eloquence? I don’t think I’ve ever heard Melania Trump speak.

She needs to stop tweeting ‘til the ‘ludes wear off.

I think Cher is angry or worried about something, you guys. I think.

So he was the black son of an illiterate junkie from a poor neighborhood in disrepair? Well shit! Of COURSE he was murdered. Duh.

He used white paper to wipe his ass. WHITE. Proof he hates white people and would kill them if he could.

It reads like an accusation. “This piece of shit from illiterate drug addict parents became a symbol.” It’s really weird, even for CNN.

#allwipesmatter

What kind of toilet paper did Freddie use?! Importance level= over 9000

On the street where he was taken into custody:

It’s incredible what makes people become unglued. Motherfucker, smoking inside buildings has been outlawed basically everywhere for YEARS. This is not new information. Yet this is what he decided was worth killing someone over? Some defenseless employee just doing her job, telling him something any idiot knows? The…

“Practice your attitude” = “Women and black people should remember how to speak when talking to their betters.”

This country fucking scares me.

That woman was just doing her job and enforcing policy. No one should be afraid they will get shot for doing their job and worry someone is going to pull a gun on them because they had an attitude.

This is our version of normal now—it’s on us to “carefully approach” every single person we come in contact with because they may shoot us.

Jesus Fucking Christ, the dude they got a quote from in the story:

No, but my guinea pigs are named Buddy and Andy. It’s short for Rosebud and Misandry.

I have an exclusive pic of the wedding:

Oh cum all ye faithful.