I see they’ve reanimated Conway to battle Omarosa.

Ohio State Football: “Man, what a terrible day.”

feed her to a bear

No, I’ve noticed no issues from having uneven rows of teeth. I’m also lucky in that my teeth are pretty straight without ever having had braces. 

Asset forfeiture is a scandal and a travesty. If conducted at all it should be court-approved and paid into the state like taxes, not used as an individual sheriff’s personal or departmental slush fund.

It’s the upper midwest.  Rust follows us all around.  Like that mayhem motherfucker from the Allstate commercials.

Does rust just follow you around?

As someone who is about to go to the laundromat I must assure you that those pictures are not indicative of what is normally seen in a laundromat. For starters, those machines are very clean and all appear to be in working order.

Oh, you have to go look up the This American Life episode about Colonel Sanders. Dude was not a racist. He had a black attorney who worked closely with him and dude loved to fuck with people by telling them he was his son. When he died, he was learning Spanish so he could market to Hispanics. 

My sister contracted a norovirus at her in-laws over Thanksgiving that fall. The bits and pieces we’ve heard is that she shit her pants more than once, couldn’t hold down water or gatorade and had to ride home from the holiday weekend laying flat in the backseat of the car, with her kids in the 3rd row. I couldn’t…

I think carving out some time mid-drive is a good plan when feasible, but it really relies on what you’ve got along your route.

Star for birthday test drives. I will be doing this now.

Corvette Go Kart? Anyone?

so I end up like all these sad sack Bears fans beating off over a team that won thirty goddamned years ago.

But you only gotta beat Green Bay, and Rodgers, bless his soul, gets hurt all the time ... just kidding, the Bears will suck ‘til football is banned by President Ivanka

The NFL’s ratings are up in relation to general TV viewership trends

I envy those Bears fans.

I’d quit watching but “my” team just won the Super Bowl this year. Of course now I dread them not going back in my lifetime so I end up like all these sad sack Bears fans beating off over a team that won thirty goddamned years ago. They’ve barely been worth mentioning since save for one blip of a season where they…

The first damage was reported in September of ‘17, which was right after Hurricane Harvey hit Texas.

“so I pulled the trigger” is right up there with “hold my beer” and “guys, watch this!”