Of course, the risk of concussions and head trauma increases exponentially when you can’t find your helmet.

Chyna is to Prince as Farrah Fawcett was to Michael Jackson.

I’m figuring you thought Coldplay ruled last year’s show...

Dear Facebook Constitution Law Attorneys;

6.05 A batter is out when—

+1 Sister Abigail

Because people who don’t believe that the world revolves around their likes and dislikes (i.e. wrestling people that aren’t Vince) book NXT.

Cause Cold Stone says so!

Gawker Inc. rules state you are only permitted to crack jokes about:

Exactly. Contact after the whistle happens on every. single. play. around the net. It’s not allowed. People don’t “accidentally” walk up and shove a guy or try to knock their stick away. If we’re putting people in the box for “contact” and “intent” after the whistle then may as well switch the bench and the penalty…

Whitesnake @ the AMP last year. It was basically a tailgate party with stadium seating, full of the cast of Heavy Metal Parking Lot +30 years. It was awesome. Dudes dressed like college professors and accountants but rocking out with reckless abandon like they did in the 80's. Gave me hope for my future...

1. I approve of your last name.
2. Heavy Metal Parking Lot culture is alive and well here in Arkansas. Just head on over to the local concert venue whenever basically any hair band comes through on their 40th “farewell” tour. It’s glorious.

Scripted? Yes Fake? No

Nice HST homage.

“One time things got really crazy. We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the asprin began to take hold. I remember saying something like “I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive...” And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge…

Do they give them the same speech they gave me in law school (you know, the same one they gave in The Paper Chase...) - “Look to your left, then to your right. This time next year, one of you will not be here...”...?

The kid’s whole schooling is based around hanging out with pro ballplayers, and he didn’t even know who the hell Bo Jackson was. What the fuck?

Yeah. It’s pretty much the same as a skate. Except the whole “distinct kicking motion” debate gets shelved for what I guess is a “distinct header motion.”

Seems like an unfair advantage, given that Chimera had three heads.

Nah. A wide-brimmed fedora is classy as hell if you can pull it off (though that “if” is important). The trilbies that neckbeards so love, though? Those were never really properly “cool”.