Running away as fast as possible from a group of National Guard soldiers firing copious amounts of tear gas at them. 

Basically their victory lap is all about screaming “there’s no proof he’s not guilty!”

Did you make sure to wear your tinfoil hat while typing that?

I would have called it “intentionally being a dumbass,” but you’re a more polite person than I. 

90% of the Splinter commentariat get their news exclusively from Twitter. 

That’s because a solid 80% off the country does not give a shit what an exceedingly bitchy and shallow minded 20% decide to run around yelling about, hate to tell you. 

Texas alone could stop the “uprising” Blest is calling for.

Seriously, Splinter spent two full months gloating about AOC and Ilhan Omar. Trump gets cleared, you better believe he’s going to jam it down their throats. Though how Splinter bloggers can console each other with all that crow in their mouths is anyone’s guess. Slack chat maybe?

The Dead Sea is a day away from developing some serious salt envy. 

Mostly from Democrats.

To be fair they only say they’re more intelligent because they went to expensive liberal arts schools and were able to perfectly parrot their professors’ political opinions, and the professors must be super smart right? So now they must be super smart too! Boom! Instant undeserved superiority complex. The amount of…

If Rachel Maddow cries on air MSNBC’s ratings would have skyrocketed. 

That’s typical of all his posts. Most of them are are just a bunch of fluff and irrelevant anecdotal bullshit but if you call him out on it he’ll just go in to another 200 word rant about “blah blah I have a ‘terminal’ degree in Literature so this totally doesn’t make me sound like a spaz.”

They don’t teach that at pricey liberal arts schools. 

Do you ever get tired of being wrong or are you just a customer service rep conditioned to have bad takes?

And I think you two are retards for thinking “ahh the fourth Reich!” When the reality has shown across all races that “crazy people gonna go crazy.”

Then why ignore the nationality if, as you say, you don’t have to be part of said country? It presumes you don’t want it known. 

Stormy Daniels, who now owes like 800k to Trump over attorneys’ fees?

I don’t became South African if I’m inspired by Elon Musk or Mandela. 

Because you did it? Oh hooray some unemployed philosophy major explained money. Except you forgot we assign value to that paper as a society, so my transitive explanation continues to work and you still sound like a dumbass undergrad.