I once had a string of wrong number texts from multiple different people. One was setting up a homework session; I told them I’d bring snacks. I hope someone brought snacks

Was it a lady BIC pen? Was she holding a thick black sharpie?

HONESTLY.

A PEN IS BASICALLY MY BONER SHE WANTS ME.

“Cardinals are red,

#MasculinitySoFragile

Stop sending ambiguous signals like being nice. It’s cruel to lead men on. But also don’t be mean, because then you’re a bitch and deserve what you get. Note that “being mean” includes remaining emotionally neutral, you frigid slut.

Corgis, too. At a party my sister was having a few years back, her bigger dog pulled a costco bag of hamburger buns off the counter, and her corgi ate *all* of them. Like, 30+.

Nope. That honor goes to my dad. He did foot the bill because my mom insisted (and it was really her show, which I was fine and happy with), but other than that, he acted nothing like a father of the bride or even a half-ass guest. He didn’t smile, he acted very put-upon, he didn’t converse with the guests, and he…

It’s been 8 years. And even then, I was just more fascinated by the sheer train-wreck crazy of this woman. Part of me almost admires it the way you do a good thunderstorm, she’s a phenomenon of nature.

If we weren’t probably in different continents I would happily wager shiny pound coins that we were related. I’m sorry your big day got hijacked like that, you have to wonder what the fuck people think they’re doing when they play stunts like that.

...I think you win. My dad cutting in on my first dance with my husband is nothing in comparison.

No because that would be my crazy Aunt who did the following:

If anyone can think of any reason why these two should not be joined in holy matrimony, please passive-aggressively blog about it right now, right here, during the ceremony, with your champagne gold iPhone 6, which is so last June anyway because the rose gold iPhone 6s is where it’s at now.

See, when you enter a house in Japan, you take your shoes off at the entry.

I feel like most people who don’t condone violence have never needed to use it. Find yourself in a situation where it’s necessary and THEN tell me how you “don’t condone it.” I get everyone has their boundaries. Mine are when you try to physically violate me, I fight back. Period.

I’m glad that you’re aware of your issues and are actively working on them. I feel having self-awareness of your actions and how they may affect your kids is very important. And please listen to close friends or your partner if they tell you that a behavior is not okay! As a daughter to a mom who was like this…

However, that does not mean that that a dysfunctional, enmeshed relationship was not also part of the picture. From a clinical standpoint, violence and filicide is viewed as a means for the child of such a relationship to separate psychologically and establish a separate identity- something that seems impossible as…

Ugh, that poor girl. Kids should not be used to fill the gaping, therapy-shaped hole in their parents’ lives.

Personally I would be furious but once he anger subsided I would definitely agree to stand up and announce I’m pregnant at their wedding. Even if I fucking wasn’t and if she said anything I would just remind her that hey she got engaged during my wedding.