Once there was a player who stood and peed next to the pitch.

In regards to the manufacture of almond milk, does the author know how many priests are required to coax the milk from the dark universe within a given almond? Are we considering that, maybe, there just aren’t enough acolytes or enough strange crystals to go around to fuel this lust? Also, what effect to the almond…

He’s legit the only reason CNN still has even a shred of credibility.

The Pulse massacre has launched Anderson into full IDGAF mode.

Pam Bondi: “I was defending the constitution”

It’s Florida.

She’s an attorney? A real one? Not an Orly Taitz matchbook cover school of law attorney, but an actual, should be able to speak better off the cuff than the average reality show star, attorney?

you’re my son & i love yuo

I love this blog, mom!

That’s the response I was looking for.

This is so stupid and I love it so much.

Canadian Counterpoint: Eagles shitting all over a truck with dead fish in the back of it.

Fuck geese. Goose is a trash bird. I hope it dies next time.

This is an intriguing statement. *raises brow*

Some of us have big butts.

How the hell would you even? I don’t even understand the logistics behind that.

Same! Mr. B says perfectly rational things like, “The more you throw out now, the less stuff we have to move later” and “HOLY SHIT WHY DO YOU HAVE SO MANY CLOTHES WHEN YOU WEAR THE SAME 3 OUTFITS ALL THE TIME” but I still haven’t gotten around to it.

I love the KonMari method of decluttering. I wrote about the beginning of my decluttering on groupthink a couple of months ago. I also usually hate self-help crap, but that book really spoke to me. I think it was the author’s polite but dogged eagerness, and the fact that she is clearly insane.

See, the thing is, my husband read this book too and now is like “does this bring you joy?” and it’s like, no, this piece of tupperware is pretty joy-neutral, but not storing leftovers in my pocket is a net good. And I know that it’s summer and I won’t wear this red sweater for months, but I will in the fall and I…