Your G63 review is still on my top 5 favorite cars reviews.

Brian Cooley most brutal review was for the Aston Martin Vantage.

Is that near the Audi Of Broken Dreams?

The worst mod I did was trading my brand new Accord for a 2007 M5 with 128,000 miles like Tavarish told me to! Now I’m bankrupt, divorced, ride a bike to work and live in a broken BMW down by the river!

This bad boy. A girl I knew in college needed me to help her with something on her car(so long ago I don’t even know what I did, this was around the early 2000s) but my reward was this... thing. At the time, I had a 97 Mitsu Galant that I entered in shows:

Because my friend had an ‘88 Mazda 626, we were in high school, it was summer, we were bored, and it was on sale at Checker Auto Parts.

Some idiot at Volkswagen decided that buyers of the 2015 Golf / Golf SportWagen S and SE get the tasteful, brushed aluminum...but that we SEL drivers would appreciate piano-black plastic that attracts fingerprints like a mofo. So I covered all of the trim in some convincing-looking, texturized 3M wrap material on my…

Ammo can airbox-snorkel for a jeep

HAH! I bought a 1987 K5 Blazer, effectively the two door version of the Suburban you had, and after giving it a more thorough look after purchasing it and getting it legal, noticed it had a bunch of purple underbody neons. I converted the ash tray into a switch panel, I’m guessing you had the exact same flip down ash…

One time, my fiance and I were driving our nice new Dodge Ram through a bit of a thunderstorm...

Okay, maybe cheating a little bit because I haven’t seen them YET (I plan to, soonish!)

No. Driving with your highs on is way worse. You don’t create a safety situation when you type in all caps. It just looks stupid.

SHIT THAT WARNING LIGHT IS FOR HIGH BEAMS? I THOUGHT IT WAS THE ELECTRIC JELLYFISH REPELLENT.

YES. SEE. I’M THAT ASSHOLE WHO’S RIGHT BEHIND YOU IN TRAFFIC OR ON A SMALL ROAD WITH THEIR BRIGHTS ON.

So the moral of the story is to be just aggressive enough to be a stormtrooper because they never hit anything

These are one of the few cars where a vacuum leak can be accompanied by a fuel line leak and the two together make the car actually run okay.

Eat a Snickers, Ballaban.

Wait...is there like a Star Wars movie coming out sometime soon? They really should do more to promote it.

The engine bay is like a piece of H.R Geiger’s work