It ain’t that easy (note: I’m the local HOA pres myself). Even in our very simplistic, very low-key HOA bylaws, the rules for changing the bylaws are (for good reasons, mostly) very difficult to execute. For us, to change the bylaws, requires 80% of all residents to agree, and to agree, they must sign the form AND…

In the 90s, my uncle lived in an uber-tony Boca Raton subby that had the same rule. At the time I drove a rusty POS (in grad school, so of course I did) pickup that the gate guy was even hesitant to allow in, let alone park for a few hours. Staying overnight with the truck on his driveway was strictly verboten.  At…

there will be a live show with themed characters interacting with each other and guest

I’ll wait for the $39.99 Groupon.

What the hell is a “stripped hen”?

I’m guessing people viewed this as a fire of inconvenience rather than a fire of dire danger, and wanted to collect their work laptop instead of having to explain to IT why it went missing. Not defending these people disobeying orders, but perhaps they didn’t sense urgency, and instead acted like this was nigh a…

Cybertruck owner, who goes by the name SpykeDaddy

Alternate title:  Hail described as snow in antiquated, archaic NWS reports, and it hailed during a summer storm, so absolutely nothing unusual happened but we need clicks so let’s bullshit this story as much as possible.

entire flight we had passengers yelling and cursing at us because it was so hot

How does ordering 65K of something equate to theft? Maybe they allowed employees to take an extra one for the spouse, and there’s been considerable turnover at the plant in the 2.5 years. Perhaps they choose to order them in blocks of 20K at a time? Maybe they like to keep 10-20K in stock on site at all times?

why it took a tragic death to get this officer off the road

Translation: she was mail-order girlfriend/bride, abandoned at the last second by the cold-feet dirtball.

Gram Parsons and David Crosby are pissed.

from its planned August 8 date all the way to October 2027

This is quite a useful mindset in many aspects of life, most of which involve being late leaving for something the wife wants/needs.  “Honey, how do you know that my 9 minute delay didn’t alter the timewarp and prevent a head-on collision with 6 fully loaded dumptrucks?  Can’t it be assumed my chronic tardiness is the…

1.67 Bank.  Fractions are for chumps and nancy boys.

What did she plan to do outside of her car to the SUV Driver that she couldn’t shout from her driver’s seat? My guess is to hawk tuah some lung butter on the guy’s leather seat, but nowadays, some rando walking up aggressively to your window is grounds for an SYG response....she’s lucky her car noped out on her before…

The named a boat “HMS Terror” and thought good things would come from this?

Follow up thought --- how does one swim a triathlon portion in a (moving, flowing) river?  Either both portions go perpendicular to flow, and force a swimmer to constantly adjust, or else it’s downstream and then upstream, and how weird is that?

the triathlon will be shortened to a (totally lame) duathlon