I heard he owned a hoodie

The police officer’s parents are already in the media trying to spin him as a “good father” and a “family man”, never mind that he’s divorced and has two children born within 12 days of each other by two different women.

I feel like I can say with total confidence that literally no black person on that train (“rap minstrel” or otherwise) said:

Oh I let him go all right.

The one that really jumped out was managing to spend ten grand a year on clothes described as ‘not fancy’. They must have a different definition of fancy than us poors do.

These look like Nutritional Facts and I don’t look at those.

He might just be smarter than the average bear, but that isn’t a high bar to clear. He’s probably dumber than the smartest bear though - they can open those bear cans and pull them out of trees and shit.

Except in most cases this isn’t two lanes of traffic flowing at equal speeds nicely zippering together. Most of the time this is one lane of traffic that is backed up and stop and go while the other lanes, as in this case, are moving at normal speed. These asshats don’t merger back where there’s ample room, instead…

No fucking way is that anything comparable to “a proper zipper merge.”

Fuck that “gap is a gap” line of bullshit. When people leave a zone between themselves and the car in front, it’s for safety, not for some idiotic toolbag to stuff themselves into.

Your “a gap is a gap” rule is a bit misleading. If I’m leaving a car-length gap, it’s for safety. You cutting in and making the gap 3 inches forces everyone to slow down.

A gap is a gap until a rogue warrior swoops in to fill it. People need to brake in order to re-establish a safe following distance.

What kind of zippers do you use? The guy passed several openings before getting to the solid white line.

I’m finding that a lot of people on jalopnik don’t know the difference between a lane change and a zipper merge.

Don’t compare this to a zipper merge. This is NOT a zipper merge. At all.

Good. Seriously fuck this guy and everybody like him. They actually slow traffic down because everybody needs to brake to let them in.

Rudy is that a-hole you know at work that complains that white history month should exist since there is black history month.

countertaek: Rudy is a story about if a white guy whines enough about how he really, really wants to do something a bunch of black guys are more qualified to do, other white guys will give him the job.

I once had a really close guy friend (or so I thought) put the moves on me once after a night out at the bar. When I rebuked him, he said, "Oh, so you'll fuck every other guy except the one who actually gives a shit about you." I turned around and left his house without saying a word.

I'm giving myself an Adult Award this week because the other day I asked a guy out, he said he wasn't interested, we had a conversation about it, and now we're going to continue being friends and I feel good about it.