I enjoy the X-Files episode where the monster controls the HOA

This is a a real issue. I did this on Holy Thursday. While having my feet washed and I could not stop until the end of mass. It caused a horrible chain reaction.

Literally 1/4 of my paycheck goes to student loans. The idea I will ever own a house is a total joke.

Stop describing my last 3 relationships before I kill myself

link? #nosey

I know of at least 2 weddings where it happened and the bride/groom were not told ahead of time. It was the end all be all of attention whoring

I am obviously all about this idea

She’s short, hadn’t had kids yet and danced for hours every day?

I uhm have about 2 inches from my rib cage and my natural waist. You don’t want to know what I look like in high rise pants. I can’t wear shorts without looking like a damn fool. I never wore real low rise pants due to muffin top etc but those mid rise sort of things? First time I could Ever wear jeans. I owned my…

I can’t unsee that

Mine is photos of my cats & my friends’ kids. My life is quite pathetic

In the Catholic church it’s called the “Virtus” program. Mostly it involves people never being alone with kids and being fingerprinted. We only complain about it when it contradicts the boy scout/girl scout policy, which is a pain in the ass.

Honestly you should. I’ve done it for very good friends as a wedding gift, which only sounds like a cheap ass wedding gift until you realize what I’m giving them. I’m giving their attendant a pass on a lot of stuff (and I actually did the make up for bride/bridesmaids with one wedding too). Having someone to pass off…

He’s slowly emerging from his phase of denying the thing that made him famous phase. He’s being somewhere between William Shatner and Shannon Doherty right now.

I created a spotify account specifically to listen to it...it’s not as bad as Bill Shatner

This story is burned in my brain

I feel like we should be exchanging crazy family stories over drinks...

Uh no the last time I did this I started a small war

Because if you name your kid Emma Leigh or Emma Lee it’s a ~unique~ version of Emily. Believe me I work with kids it happens tons.

My name is Emily and now I have the special joy of trying to convince people I’m over the age of 20 (I’m 33).