“The haunting of our community in 2020 by a gnome who favoured ‘Jolene’ and ‘Here Comes Your Man’ whilst he besieged our village, relieving its byways of integrated circuitry deemed unredeemable by others...”

just when I thought you couldn’t be any more interesting, you drop this. 

Author seems to be from a weird, alternate reality where there was more than one Matrix movie.

I’ve been reading Jalopnik for a long time, ever since my friend and I Googled “1975 Plymouth Duster” in 2010 and a picture of his car on Jalopnik came up in one of the old “Down On The Street” articles Murilee Martin did. (Dang I miss those)

I desperately need to see Torch order food with it in a drive through.

petition to remove all video from the internet. i think overall it’d be a net positive.

FASHION

Please give us a poll to vote on writer submissions.

You can take the slideshow and shove it up managements ass. That reminds me of a movie with a great overlander:

Nope, fuck your slideshow. Did not read.

ah yes... conservatives “disagree” with math. because there’s both sides to math....................... GTFAC.

It's safe to assume these people are fucking morons because they're acting like fucking morons. 

Fuck these selfish assholes.

Dude - panel vans already exist.

If it was bone stock....still probably not, but maybe. The 2 tone does not suit this car well, nice work leaving the drive thru carwash wiper bag on the rear for pictures, and AFTERMARKET SUNROOF?!!?!?!? That’s got to be the worst idea ever.

As a former assistant grocery store manager back in the 1980s, I can tell you that the quality of produce can be based on the distributor in the area. My former employer, Foodland/Clover Farm, used Stewart/King/McKenzie of Selma, AL as their produce supplier, and they had the best produce around. Our crosstown rival,…

The dealer industry should all take a field trip to an Apple store.

A guy who can’t keep a job falls in love with a girl who turns out to be artificial.

Yeah, it would be.

R.E.M.
No way 'Lotus' should be on this list. First of all, no matter what you think of the song, "Up" is a good album, very underrated, but by no means "great." Second, "Out of Time" is a great record that's derailed by TWO bad songs: "Radio Song" and "Shiny Happy People." How can a record with two awful songs still…