This whole marketing plan has the claw marks of team cat all over it...

She’s just worried that is what she’s going to be known as, too. She’s deflecting.

The first political ads have started airing in Iowa. The caucuses are still 11 months away, and we have a plethora of shitty candidates scouring the state with only one benefit - They aren’t Trump. 

At this point, they’re an equal opportunity hater of all candidates running for elected office.

“Wait. So you just go someplace and borrow a book. But I don’t like to read. Reading wastes my precious finite mental energy. And you are able to do this without having to pay? And they sometimes have DVDs and Books on Tape you can rent for free? Get away from me, you socialist! Fake News! No way this place actually…

The only thing I’ve ever pan fried that was burger related was breaded pork tenderloin/fritters, because they are supposed to be cooked in a light amount of oil. And you really have to be careful when you’re placing them in a pan so you don’t get ice particles splashing back at you...

“As God as my witness, I thought turkey burgers could fry.”

Satan. I was implying he was going to hell.

Wrong deity he’ll most likely be meeting, Dreaded...

You’re a spineless fuckwad who hasn’t said “boo” to anything Cheetolini has proposed, Grassley, nor to any of his appointments, despite the outrage of your constituents... You’ve put party before the country and even your state for the last decade, compared to the Grassley who was elected in the 1980s and actually…

Tombstone made a Hulapena frozen pizza a few years ago that included small chunks of jalapeno peppers, pepperoni and pineapple. Damn it all if that wasn’t one of the best frozen pizzas they’ve ever released (even though their sauce was very weak on said pizza).

So is it anti-Eastern Orthodox to call out the brazen ways in which Trump and his presidency are playing the part of Putin’s puppet? 

More like he’s punishing California for removing National Guard troops from the border, despite Cheetolini’s requests they be stationed there for his national emergency gambit to have a chance of succeeding. 

Fuck, you want to cut down on nitrates in water supplies, get rid of pigs and watch the midwest economy and China’s implode at the same time...

She most likely didn’t drain the grease from the sausage or bacon and continued to add all the ingredients, and then left it on a very high temperature without paying attention to it. Detail was never a high point of Perino’s time with the Bush White House...

And if you act in the next 20 minutes, you can definitely get two pillows manufactured by a former crack addict turned businessman!

That ratio on the NRA tweet, though, is a thing of pure beauty... 

Even a centrist in that district isn’t going to win. Any one who wins that district is going to be conservative, period.

Weird. You really spelled Sega Genesis wrong...

You don’t negotiate with terrorists. Especially one’s who have a habit of short-shrifting their contractors. In that case, you’d get screwed two ways.