I dislike Sundays. Make me some spaghetti, Jim.

It seems kinda trifling to just like every thing she posts.

I follow my wife and almost wish I didn’t, because she gets low-key furious when I don’t heart her posts.

Hans Moleman’s “Man Getting Hit By Football”, while a mere flash of slapstick when viewed from a casual angle, has deeper meaning; even the most stalwart of men, leaving the house to take on the world and walking tall, is laid low by the football of life. The football appears from off screen, as if cast by a divine…

Errrr...wasn’t it a Jezebel writer (I’m forgetting which one) who wrote an entire post about this topic without any clue that BL was referencing the Sir Mix-a-lot song?

No, ladyology, you are not altruistic for buying a puppy. I hope you reconsider instead of paying into the commoditization of living beings. Dogs have been degraded by breeding like what you’re talking about. Dogs are not accessories to show off like a car or a bracelet. The damage humans do by breeding animals is…

Okay, but look what we’re reduced to here, stretching ourselves to determine whether there is or isn’t something wrong with some stupid ad. If there was a problem we wouldn’t be guessing, we’d know.

Ugh...come on people...

“Eleanor, did I not telleth thee that the fletchings shalt be crimson?”

With that closed loop liquid cooling system, he looks ready to overclock!

You’re saying we shouldn’t use a technology that could do a lot of good (bringing back species from the brink of extinction) because someone COULD do something bad (create more dogs that shouldn’t be reproducing in the first place). You could make the same argument for genetic testing on infants, no? Sure, it could…

She was celebrating her! Remember?! Like how at a surprise party everyone jumps out and reads the list of personal care products you bought on Amazon. It’s called tradition.

You must have missed the part about it working for all canids.

Fuck those Ethiopian wolves! There’s already 400 of them, they can go extinct, am I right?

Langley is an unusual bright star in the deep dark abyss that is the condition of women—let alone truly powerful women—in Hollywood.

Also, Google results, most of which are about the divorce.

“Jezebel is a fart cannon”, has 156,000 results.

I’m pretty sure none of this is a thing.

Also, “Judnick” sounds like an off-brand Soviet satellite.

So, wait. A $7 million settlement, and the charge is withdrawn, and was only found in a divorce filing and not in any police report?

The funny thing is that the whole “children are invincible” thing came from Morrowind.

“But Morrowind didn’t have children!” you exclaim. Correct, BASE Morrowind dind’t have children. But the modding community was really, really dedicated, and so in one of the attempts to make the cities busier (with randomly…

The Zebra F-301 is the man among boys of ballpoint pens; writes smoothly, holds enough weight so one can't lose it or misplace it easily while maintaining a lightness that doesn't hamper the writing hand.

The Zebra F-301 is the man among boys of ballpoint pens; writes smoothly, holds enough weight so one can't lose it…

On a boring October Tuesday at work in my aggressively air-conditioned office, I was going to comment on this story. I was going to say something to the effect of, “Uh, okay?” or “Huh?” or “So?” but then I was reminded of a sentiment instilled in me from the hazy long ago days of my youth. If you don’t have anything…