Oh good! I’m going to brush off my old manuscript, The Genocidal Hutu Millionaire’s Virgin Tutsi Secretary....

In other news: Water is wet, fire is hot and scissors are sharp.

There are no Waffle Huts in Wisconsin.

I’v never met Tommy Craggs. More than that I’ve never heard of him. I just wish just once he would fall drunkenly in front of the A train so I could sacrifice my life in order to save him. It would be a small price to pay for the thousands of tiny kindnesses he would have shown me had we but met. Like marrying my wife…

“I always thought of myself as a brave lady, but the town - if you can call it that - of Colfax managed to pull out that last little bit of scared little girl out of me, tugging at my otherwise rock-solid composure like idle hands around a loose sweater thread.

In my naiveté, I thought I would stroll around Colfax…

Damnit, Kara, a dolphin is not a shark. Did you go to school in Texas or something?

Am I stupid or is that a dolphin, not a shark?

Clearly a dolphin...

Yes, I am. Also the super precious text message.

Kewl hair to show everyone how creative, original, and independent you are!

Really? This sounds like something a 16 year old read in a book and is only repeating without understanding to me.

“ the reality is that males go topless whereas females can’t even wear crop tops.”

I also spend a lot of time on Tumblr

I wouldn’t wear a crop top in solidarity for anything, not even the Dalai Lama. Do what you do, tho, we’re all on the same team of making the lives of teenaged girls less shit.

Feminists and other feminists are natural enemies. Just like brothers and sisters.

It really bothers me how much the issue of manspreading is taking away from other critical feminist issues like how much I should judge other women for shaving their pubes.

Makes sense! HOWEVER...I would like to tell the following story:

$> run UpdateGirlfriend