I thought it was fake organs?!

I could have just folded the paper by myself and done a better job. Besides, I finish quicker and I enjoy it a lot more when I'm alone.

Fake origamis are killing America. Dude. That receipt from Taco Bell you folded up into an uneven triangle is not origami. Come ON.

Always leave the body in the spot it died. I swear, it works.

OMG, I ALWAYS remember that Onion article. Back then, it was funny. Now its just too ironic to be LOL funny. I feel like we're slipping BACKWARDS....

Right up there with "I'm Totally Psyched About this Abortion!!"

That line is THE LAW. Or something.

One of my favorites!

I forgot about that one!!! Oh my god, classic!

It's infused with the power of hip hop, though.

Just hoping more like it. Hate to imagine that someone like him is making so much more money than I.

Yeah, you're right. I assume his next line of questioning included What's it like playing with Tim Brady?

He really is just the worst.

Though a limited offensive contributor, few opponents dared to try and make a play against Snarles O'Dannon.

Feel like it's prudent to share this:

No, they'd chalk it off to "gang activity" and/or call it "drug related."

Unfit at any field.

Wow, Chris Brown is gonna be hella disappointed when he finds out beating cancer isn't what he thinks it is.

Solid, Liquid, Gas, Plasma

Blinky, Pinky, Inky, Clyde