Up is such a banquet of sorrow that some equally sad scenes always get overlooked. The scene that always gets me the most is near the end but before the climax, when Carl abandoned Kevin and Russell and he's sitting in his empty, dead house, all alone, just staring into space.

This is about stuff that shouldn't have broken you down, but did. There is no shame whatsoever in breaking down when you watch Jurassic Bark.

The first Pokemon Movie, when Ash turns to stone. I was ten or eleven or whatever and at a cousin's house. My cousin asked me why I was crying and I of course went "I'M NOT CRYING!" blubber sniff. She said she was sad too and I shouldn't be ashamed. Lots of feelings happened that day.

For what it's worth, I knew lots of liberals who swore up and down during the 2012 elections that Republican turnout would be way down, because Southern Baptists and similar groups see Mormons as a non-Christian cult, and they'd never support one. I didn't know many Mormons or Baptists, so I took them at their word.

In The Screwtape Letters, C.S. Lewis said that evil religious zealots who hated each other on Earth were punished by being made into wine and mixed with each other in Hell.

Here's one: Ω

I can not remember where or from who, but I distinctly remember a religious history course in college where there was one interpretation of Genesis that said Adam was rock-hard all the time. (Until he got banished, of course)

Most people, religious and not, are 'a hell of a lot quieter' than Left Behind-loving evangelical millenialists. I've come to think of them as the equivalent of guys who play Warcraft 23 hours a day and write rape threats to Zoe Quinn for the 24th hour and say that they speak for 'real gamers.'

THAT BULLSHIT LITTLE MAN AIN'T MY BROTHER!

Are there any good metal albums about a completely literal interpretation of Revelations? I'd listen to that.

If I had to pick an NBA player to guide me through a post-Rapture Earth, it would be Dennis Rodman, hands down.

Yes, they're all neigh-theists.

It's all wrapped up in the paranoid political conspiracy theories that these guys also believe. A good rule of thumb is that is something interferes with your ability to be a misanthropic asshole with a superiority complex, it's probably the work of the devil.

Led Zeppelinism?

Every NFL season there's like at least six coaches named Mike*. It must be like the Bruce sketch from MPFC when they all get together.

Bicycle Repairman?

Or a Republican's way to vent their rage. Is your middle name HUSAIN SOETERO, by any chance?

Andy is the kid from Toy Story, obviously.

It's kind of like how if you name your daughter Brandi or Roxy, you want her to be a stripper, for whatever reason? If you name your kid Groot, not only are you stupid, but you want a kid that's even stupider.

That's good, because my first association for Joanna would be "THESE ARE NOT JOANNA EGGS!"