I’m so conflicted...

I’m speechless, but with 36,895 comments, I haven’t always been speechless.  This post is the best prize ever!  Thanks so much, Andrew!

That’s because there is no alternative to the Frontier if you want a smaller pickup truck. The rest of them have bloated up to mid-sized.

Meanwhile, the 473 year old Nissan Frontier sold 72,369 units...

“And maybe Nissan is fine with that, given that 31,514 is still a decent number (historically speaking) for a truck introduced in 2010...”
The Titan debuted in late 2003 as a 2004 model.

Police: “Hey, where you going with that tuba”?

FIFY

You can’t run, hide, or overpower a giant monster. Your only chance is to pretend to be one of its children and hope that it’s a bad parent who never paid much attention to little Minizilla. Why else would I own a Baby Godzilla costume and vape pen, Jason? I’M NOT A WEIRDO, OK.

Bud! I live in Georgetown on your way up. Summit is looking at 2 feet of snow tonight through Friday, You are going to need a car with AWD/4WD or they won’t let you drive up I70 Westbound. New laws as of this year. Just be aware not to totally cheap out on the rental.

So many great submissions. I’ll just add the P71 Police Interceptor. It has had a very long career.

Tavarish is unwatchable fingernails-on-a-chalkboard now but Demuro is still lovable weirdo Demuro, who actually just bought the “Barbie Gelandewagen” 

Sorry Patrick I didn’t get my roast in to Ballaban in time. You are an amazing editor. Thanks very much for all of your effort in helping me develop as a writer. Most mostly I want to thank you for crashing that Camaro mule into that wall in Detroit. Without your selfless act you would have had no need to hire a pro…

True story: On his first day of jail he walked right up to the biggest dude in the joint and understeered him right into the cell block wall.

One time, Patrick invited me to get lunch with him. So we went to Planet Hollywood in Times Square, one door down from Jalopnik HQ. We ordered, then he realized he had a more important meeting to go to, and left me to eat a soggy salad by myself in the most depressingly cheerful restaurant I’ve ever been in.

Patrick, thanks for not banning Mergio or I back in the day.

So much for being grounded to the ground

What’s the automotive equivalent of a meth addiction? This.