Turkey Fucks Chicken

“If he fought a guy bigger than him, he would lose.”

Just shut up and throw the ball through the basketball ring.

If only you’d made it 3 sentences further...

It is a very short article, yet you clearly did not read it.

This is the exact line I used when I asked my wife to marry me.

I would suggest Biden stay in the race, if only to have Trump commit more impeachable offences attempting to have Biden investigated. Last week it was Ukraine, yesterday China, what country will it be today?

Nice subtle hand size reduction in the first one.

“... something which definitely would have escalated the situation had the troll been an actual constituent struggling with mental illness.”

Well, you’re right. “Embarrassment” really isn’t the right word. Maybe “self-protection.” It’s like when criminals want a witness silenced before the witness brings down the whole gang. 

At this point, I’m wondering if Senate Republicans might vote to convict Trump out of sheer embarrassment. Trump and Rudy bumbling around like amateurish morons makes the whole party look bad, while also calling attention to the corruption from which they all benefit. More and more prominent Republicans are getting…

He has no idea whether he recalled her, or fired her, or who she is, or what she does. He only knows Rudy said “she’s in the way of our crimes” so he’s like “OK” and it ended there, as far as he’s concerned.

I’m impressed that Russel Wilson is being this aggressive early since history shows that he’s usually super-late to score.

Temecula work for you?

Now that I know she’s fucking I just slid into her DM’s. Fingers crossed 

Nintendo also needs to help reclaim red hats ASAP after this is all through.

He things Magas will start a civil war and save him. He underestimates how lazy his supporters are.

Let’s get the obvious out of the way: He’s not going to be impeached. McConnell and the Senate simply won’t let it happen.

Oh man, Mitt Romney’s brow is gonna be SO FURROWED when he sees this.

If someone just up and asked him “What would you be willing to give to a country in exchange for them opening an investigation into your political rivals to help your 2020 political fortunes?” the only answer I know for a fact he wouldn’t give is “Nothing, because that would be unethical in any event and especially…