Am I supposed to be relieved by this? This man knowingly and willingly exposed his partners to a potentially life threatening disease without their consent. At least one contracted the disease.

Okay I hate Chris Pratt now. Dammit, Andy Dwyer! I loved you so much.

If only we had known how economically insecure they were!

I explain Judaism all the time. Even questions about “But don’t you believe in Jesus?” I don’t tell them fuck off and figure it out themselves. My God, don’t you want people to learn? Especially from someone who has positioned herself as a spokesperson? smdh

So if someone is publicly lambasting you, you wouldn’t want to explain your side and ask them personally for a more nuanced view of their take? Also, it’s kind of fucked up to write:

Again, didn’t Tilda Swinton literally say “feel free to tell me to fuck off” meaning “I understand if you don’t want to educate me on this, if that’s the case just say so no worries.”?

This isn’t like running up to a person using a wheelchair and asking “What’s your community’s stance on the ADA?”

Wait, what? Swinton knew and respected Cho’s work, knew that she had a strong opinion on the issue, and asked to be put in touch to understand Cho’s point of view.

It really feels like lose/lose for Tilda here.

Yeah, I mean I would get it if Tilda just picked some random Asian out of a hat but Cho was specifically criticizing Swinton as early as May so it makes the go to person to ask why people are upset with you is the person who is saying people are upset with you.

I’m really curious. Cho set herself up as someone the media would continually turn to about this issue. Why wouldn’t someone else turn to them for their opinion? Tilda was asking what the issue was and got a response, Cho said she should be more aware and Tilda said great, I am also giving voice to Asians.

Cho has made herself one of the main voices of this debate and was publicly criticizing the movie and Swinton. If someone does that, they can’t then claim that if someone wants to talk about it with them that they are being turned to as the only Asian in the room. She has set herself up as an expert on this issue for…

This is confusing to me. If I, as a white male, need to be educated on these matters of race and gender, but I can’t ask my minority friends, honestly what do I do?

Agreed on all points. And this conversation was definitely too fraught and nuanced to be had over email.

I am also white. It seems like maybe Cho was being nice and diplomatic instead of saying what she really thought. It seems like Tilda was honestly trying but also trying to promote the movie and say how it is actually okay. Maybe Cho viewed in negativity in hindsight because she felt like she couldn’t say her real…

Everything you said makes a lot of sense. I know there’s a lot of frustration around minorities being expected to shoulder the burden of explaining things to white people, or having to be nice to white people in order to “heal,” when white people aren’t asked to make any concessions. Which I think is bullshit. And I…

She has connections to a different culture, whatever. The point is Swinton made an honest and well-intentioned attempt to understand this issue and was not rude or offensive about it at all. And Cho shat on her publicly for no good reason.

Thanks for this. As much as I try to understand other viewpoints, at the end of the day my perspective is going to be different than that of someone from an Asian or minority background. I see your point and how Tilda’s responses may have come across as her brushing off Cho’s concerns.

How did a copy/pasted email exchange between 2 other people involve any bias on the part of Rich?

I’m having difficulty understanding Margaret Cho’s perspective here. It sounds like Tilda was up front about the issues, expressed her desire to do something about it and sought advice from someone who is in a good position to provide it. And Cho’s responses were thoughtful and measured as well. Not sure what got lost…