Man, I wish I could self-righteously and dramatically refuse to do shit I don’t believe in at work, such as being forced to capitalize shit that is not capitalized because it “looks better that way” and apparently everyone around here is secretly Emily Dickinson. Oh to be able to hold press conferences and have people…

I am using this as an excuse to post a picture of my dog, who is considered by some to be ugly-cute. Yes, that's a hotel room. Yes he goes on trips with us.

My Mom-Mom (black top) and her “girls” salute you Mary.

Also, consider adopting an older animal! I got a senior cat from a friend and she's the best pal I could ever ask for. Trained, calm, and just wants to be on your lap/against your side the entire time. I lucked out because she's really healthy *knock on wood* and still quite active/vocal/responsive, but having her has…

The interior at FermiLab is awesome.

My cat loves all food. He's also a horrible mooch and just generally a butt who refuses to learn good manners. He will climb ALL OVER YOU if you have food, just trying to get at that food. And then he tries to grab the plate. Or will smack your fork as you bring it to your mouth. And if you try to spray him with water…

Julie Andrews AND FUCKING CHRISTOPHER PLUMMER OKAYYY. Seriously, watching the SOM as a young child probably really screwed me up: distant, arrogant men are super attractive! (see also: Pride & Prejudice).

Or maybe there is no "Midwestern food sensibility," just "food sensibility"? I've had shitty food on the coasts and I've had amazing food in the Midwest. There are steakhouses in the Midwest that would never, ever cook like a steak like goddamn Cracker Barrel does, yet I suppose they'd be lumped into the "Midwest food…

Unfortunately, I don't think kitty would die 5 hours later. She'd probably start eating you while you were still warm. I'm a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day, I know. But I mean, if kitty dies and you follow suit.. True love, that.

Fine, xenophobic is over the top, my apologies. But I just don't get why this story is dripping with such hate for people from the Midwest. Hate on cheap people who don't tip. I get that part of the stereotyping is because some asshole left a picture of Jesus instead of a tip (which is a really, really crappy thing…

If the difference between terminating an anencephalic fetus at 21 weeks and euthanizing a senior citizen escapes you, I'm genuinely concerned for your ability to take care of yourself.

...guh.

Don't fear! I love both, and frankly the two are not super related anyway.

8:16PM Wait, the "Mistah Beeeeeeey-yahts" maid from Downton Abbey

Fargo was better, so the night is going properly.

I'm in too!!! This is Lou:

By the time I was 6, I had two little sisters. We went on our first family vacation that year, and (now that I know what kind of hell it is to share a hotel room with children) my parents weren't exactly relaxing. By the end of the trip, their plan was to load up the car while we were all still asleep (when you're…

I'm genuinely in awe of all the strong support from the amazing Jez community. I have read every word you all have written and I am tremendously moved. From the bottom of my heart - thank you all so much.