If you go to public school, have a TV, ACCESS TO FUCKIN TWITTER, then you really have no excuse to be a racist piece of shit.

Of course we could. But that isn’t the Deadspin way, now, is it?

A cranky old-timer complaining about the modern game? What are the odds?

The only thing that works harder than Tom Brady in the offseason is her top. 

Explain just exactly what in the hell you mean by this? Please be specific because this kind of “oh you are from there, so you can get fucked” is a symptom of Trump’s America.

Pretty sure “50-Year-Old Double-Header Dingers” is its own category on PornHub.

Or Joe Madden is God.

In fairness that one guy who managed them and the Dodgers back in the day, whose name I forget, basically invented modern baseball: farm systems, rotations, etc. 

Sounds like someone hasn’t finished their copy of The Secret yet. Success isn’t random; you just gotta manifest harder!

He looks like the platonic ideal of a police union spokesman 

This article is dumber than what Trump said. How is 20% a lie when they are in fact down 17%? How is comparing it to network TV instead of other sports (NBA has gone UP) a proper comparison?

Hunter never met a tab he didn't like. 

Good thing they traded James harden to avoid paying the luxury tax.

For whom the tako bell tolls...

I just found out that the Sherwin Williams Global Headquarters building is home to the famous giant LeBron James billboard in Cleveland. So perhaps this is no coincidence.

Villain is such a subjective term.

Dude... I honestly thought you photoshopped that logo and slogan. I googled it to see what it actually looked like.

I passed multiple trucks with that on it during last week’s vacation and I got infuriated every fucking time. I mean... what in the holy fuck were they thinking?

Oh the irony that both Klutch and Sherwin Williams are headquartered in Northeast Ohio.

Fun fact: Sherwin Williams is also based in Cleveland. The giant LeBron banner hangs off the Sherwin Williams building.