like this?

Yeah Poor Sophia living in a world where her folks throw her a fun-ass tie dye party and are nice and fair and invite all the neighborhood kids, even the religious whackadoo's son just in case they'd feel slighted if he wasn't invited.

Shit, she's gonna be a mess, having fun, learning good manners, wearing the shit…

This is like asking what if Dennis the Menace is really hung. I just ... can't.

I thought I read somewhere (Here on Jezebel? Probably here on Jezebel.) that Jason Dohring had a major thing for Kristen Bell while they were filming back in the day. Anyone else get the feeling that hasn't gone away?

That and the vein constantly bulging in her forehead.

I don't know much, but I do know Ms Hendricks looked smashing @ the 2010 Globes:

"Think of the current guys as the trials you must endure. "

You should realize that's the number one method of dudes on OKC, and we always know a copy/paste message when we see one. You're only getting messages back from women who are on to you but for whatever reason don't care (bored/think you're hot/need some validation at the moment). I mean, it's fine if it's working…

You're fucking kidding right? My friend sent me a picture of a guy sitting on his couch with his horse dick draped over his thigh. It was his Tinder profile picture.

"Oh, so you love to laugh? That's so different from the other women I run into in the my job at a clinic for third stage emphysema."

I feel you.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA *gasps for air* ...HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Fuck: Zac Efron, Marry: Michael B. Jordan, Kill: Miles Teller—I've already killed him multiple times in my mind during the preview for this movie.

She lost her virginity at 16 in the front seat of a Volvo sedan while listening to Jeff Buckley's album Grace.

It's complete racism. Jim Harbaugh is a fucking loon and goes crazy at least a few times a game when plays don't go his team's way. Sherman reacts to a dude stuffing him in his face with a palm so he gets a lot more leeway from me.

Aerie, American Eagle's lingerie brand, has released its new (and well-timed) ad campaign starring unretouched models. Even better, the brand declares that there will be "no more retouching our girls and no more supermodels." Nicely done.

One of my good friends is from India. He came here for college and now lives back home. He came to visit last year right around when it was all over the news about the gang rape that had happened on the bus. I remember (kinda stupidly) saying something like "Uhhh so what's going on in India??? What's with these gang…

Pebe Sebert.