I do the "Guess what?"/"Chicken butt" thing to people so many times they refuse to talk to me anymore. It is always worth it!

I forgot about that part! That's gonna be my next alarm! For the past year and a half every time I get a text my phone has Ric Flair yelling "Woo!"

When seeing if friends want to grab some food I alternate between Travolta in Battlefield Earth: "Do you want LUNCH?!?" and Gibson in the Joe Ezerthas recording: "Who wants to eat? WHO THE FUCK WANTS TO EAT?!?!? ARRRGGGGGHHHH…"

"you'll thank me on your hunting night…"

I always assumed he took his name from the singer from Saves The Day…

It's true! I'm not really the sharpest tool in the shed!

So it was more like running an errand?

Yes but it is followed by a record scratch and then a song by Smashmouth.

You mean bee-at by a minute!

"there's a reason they call me One-Take Rock."

Ah thank god I thought I was either losing my mind or my hearing!

And now you know… The rest of the story!

I'd read the fuck out of that Bible!

When I saw the movie I swear he fucked up and said the calvary. I just like the idea if "WOMAN. I am the hill where crucifixions occurred."

Comment/avatar synergy is off the charts…

*waits impatiently for bottom gun*

You get the holster. In six to eight weeks you get the bullets and another 3 weeks you get the gun.

*squints intensely*

Clowns are like Boos in Mario. Don't turn your back.

God bless America!