Previous partners of mine have enjoyed domination and loss of control, and the way we got around that is to talk about it beforehand. What types of domination do you enjoy? What types don't you enjoy? For example, someone might like being pinned, but really not be okay with having their hair pulled. Then, when you…

You're welcome! I know that some people feel that that means that I couldn't have been assaulted, because any "real" rape means fighting tooth and nail. But it was real, and while it took me a while to accept that, it's the truth. I did get good support, and I used to volunteer for a rape and abuse crisis line, so…

I'm so sorry that happened to you. I hope you had all the support you could have possibly needed.

I didn't want to Google it, because I was thinking that I wasn't going to get anything from the show! Thank you :)

I explained that certain acts were off the table, despite them being pretty "vanilla" or expected, and he assumed that I was saying that because I was concerned he would think I was slutty, so he just went ahead. I froze up and said nothing after that.

Absolutely. Not to get all heavy here, but that was exactly what happened in my assault. My rapist seriously did not think he'd done anything wrong. He just thought I didn't enjoy the sex very much, which is very different than being raped. When we talked about it, he was utterly shocked that I considered it…

Three things:

I think you're absolutely right. I should have made mention of that in my original comment. Indeed, a conversation like that would likely run into some issues with censorship, but I think it's also worth noting that a situation like the one described in the episode (whether or not a partner "accidentally slipped it…

Honestly, what I'd like to see is characters talking about it. They don't even have to like it, but this whole "oops, I tried to do something I didn't think you'd be comfortable with, so I just did it anyway" shit isn't cute or funny, and really, it's the kind of manipulative behavior that should be called out for…

Well, to be fair, an arrangement like that isn't necessarily a sign of immaturity. Just because someone shares your interests and likes to have sex with you doesn't mean that they're good relationship material. But if she thinks it's exclusive or moving towards something else and he knows it's not, then there's a…

The taste of condoms can be a little off-putting at first, but I never perform oral without some kind of barrier. It prevents the spread of disease (I mean, I would like to think I can trust my partners in telling me the truth, but you never know), and it makes the where-does-the-semen-go question irrelevant. I've…

I'm not exactly a man :) I think for a lot of people, especially women, you're taught to avoid conflict and try to get your way without having to talk about it. You see this advice in both men's and women's magazines, so it's really a shame to see it repeated here.

Hmm, I'm not sure. I think what might help is looking at menus beforehand? If you or he picked a place out online, instead of walking in, you guys could have a look at the menu, take your time, look things up you don't know, and get an idea of what you might like (pick a back-up in case there's a problem with your…

I love them, too! I don't mind if they look "bad". Frankly, most fashion is laughed at in the future, anyway, so why not just wear what I like best?

That's a good point :) Someone else pointed out the confidence issue, which I skirted over completely. Indeed, if the problem is comfort and not getting him to dress up, then I think giving compliments is a great way to go. I think they should be subtle and genuine, because I know I can tell the difference between,…

That's a very good point. Confidence/self-consciousness can really affect how someone dresses, and it's very reasonable to keep that in mind. If he feels nervous or upset, I think a nice, genuine, subtle compliment can go far. It really depends on his personality, like you said!

Exactly! It felt so embarrassing to have people make a big deal out of it. I didn't think anyone would pay attention to what I was wearing, and here I find out that they apparently do! I feel like a nice, well-placed, genuine compliment goes way further than fawning.

That's a good question! Most of my examples are kinda old, since I've since figured out how to dress more appropriately and haven't had anyone talk to me about it in a while. One I can think of was my ex-fiance's sister's wedding (sorry for that!). I wasn't sure what to wear, and he originally told me it was…

Yeah, I assume that most adults can hear reasonable criticism! It becomes a lot harder when someone won't hear a word on it, and that's a situation I'm not sure about.

Aww, thanks! :D