There's laughing, and then there's insisting that's it's a good and noble thing to be celebrated. I laughed when my friend tripped over the curb, but I didn't and wouldn't push him face first into the pavement.

Ignoring? Why, that sounds like a reasonable and workable strategy.

Okay, don't have patience for it. That's not the same as walking up to some guy talking in the street and punching him.

Yeah, but a punch to the face isn't going to shut anybody up. You'll probably need to start shooting them. And then how funny will that be? Oh, the streets will literally run red with hilarity.

Yes, I'm the troll, not the people celebrating and advocating for assault.

Go ahead, retreat to smugness since you don't actually have anything approaching a defensible position, anarchist.

Or what, you're going to punch me right in the avatar?

Yes, because you can't possibly think that more than one thing can be wrong.

I don't give two fucks about that guy, but I do believe in the rule of law. The law says we don't punch people who say stuff we don't like. I don't necessarily agree with every law, but that's one I'm pretty solidly behind.

Until the next person who deserves to be sucker punched.

So basically, you don't like violence, but violent acts fill you with glee.

I think we all remember when we heard Rush Limbaugh say, "Look at that little monkey run… for President."

Except this time it will need to be a gritty origin story, revealing exactly why this grown man acts like a petulant child, probably involving some sort of tragic parental death that he feels somehow responsible for, or even more fun, sexual abuse.

I'm not sure how racist it is to acknowledge that Eskimos live in areas with an abundance of access to free ice.

I just don't know that this "established track record" is all that established. There is a long history of women being among if not the highest pay talent in film going back to Mary Pickford and on through Doris Day and Elizabeth Taylor to Julia and Sandra and now Jennifer Lawrence. I know she got stiffed on…

Yeah, it came out later in his run than I remembered, but here's another element: previous success in the genre. Any film success Kutcher did have was in the rom-com genre; most notably What Happens in Vegas, which had come out just a couple of years prior and made about $220 million worldwide. And given that it's a…

So Natalie is upset she's not Julia Roberts or Sandra Bullock? Okay, neither is Ashton, but I'm sure he wasn't making JR or SB money either.

Actually, I've gotten some solid laughs from his shtick, and wonky eye aside, he's a good looking guy and certainly seems like he'd been an… enthusiastic lover. So unlike Billy Eichner, maybe they should a little restraint.

Another day, another Billy Eichner update.

You people just don't get it! The whole "#NickelbackHasSoldOver50MillionAlbums" isn't about bragging or scorekeeping, it's saying that every time you make fun of Nickelback, you are tacitly making fun of all their fans. And as a lifelong Phil Collins fan, I feel their pain.