Trump’s remarks were “off the cuff” and he wouldn’t talk that way as president

My fiancé loves him and loathes Hillary Clinton. It actually causes a lot of fights between us, and we’re Canadian. It’s made me question why I’d want to marry someone who supports this bag of shit.

There’s got to be something in German. Uberschize or something.

he fucking knows. that’s why he said it.

Clinton better win by a goddamned landslide.

Pool Tech here - This is embarrassing. Algae is easily controllable/preventable with proper chemical maintenance. One bottle of “Yellow Quell” would take care of this in 12 hours. I wouldn’t allow anyone to swim in this pool. Why the fuck exactly didn’t they make this an indoor facility?

Meanwhile, on the other side of the pool...

How warped is my mind from this election that my initial thought was “I wonder what batshit kind of response Trump will have?”

If nothing else, this should provoke some good reactions from Trump’s Twitter account.

At the end, it turns out that Kevin Spacey was Kitty Soze all along.

Women are seriously deprived of pockets in their clothing, so I wouldn’t expect them to understand how amazing cargo shorts are

I love my cargo shorts. I’m a middle-aged dad; we automatically receive a pair in the mail on our birthday.

Instead of editing the scenes out they could just use suggestive visuals, like so:

What a time to be alive, when the Olympic soundtrack was brought to you by Philip Glass!!

My favorite part is Philip Glass’s weird, ominous, synthy torch-lighting music. It’s starts out as a fanfare for the “space gladiator” episode of something, but by the end, you’re pretty sure the US Olympic team is going to ascend into the sky as pure energy beings who see both past and future simultaneously. Mary-Lou…

I remember watching that as a kid and hoping that it meant we would all have jet packs soon. I am still waiting. So disappointed.

If this was Jezebel, the title would’ve been “Entitled White Male Harasses Chinese Woman Online, Gets What He Deserves.”

Torch is writing for Jezebel now?

How does a cop with “11 years of training and experience” not recognize part of a donut?

It’s deeper than this guy realizes. The short version: