Faster than a speeding...wizard.

Honestly, I’d like to update. But after trying literally a dozen times, it keeps getting stuck and giving me a totally unhelpful error. Googled it, and the fixes are absurdly broad...and don’t work. So, there’s that.

My favorite - he needs to wake from his 2pm nap for a half-hour of sweets. Live that life, Robert.

I recall “ground can never cause a fumble” being a playground rule, and I always thought that made sense, even if a player wasn’t touched. It doesn’t happen often, but a couple years ago (I think) Eli Manning went down, wasn’t touched, ground dislodged the ball, and it was ruled a fumble - that seemed dumb. Make both…

They see me rollin’...

I was thinking this too - I’ve always thought the reward/punishment difference of fumbling at the 1/2 yard line vs. into the end zone was moronic. Then, I thought maybe the issue wasn’t the fumbling into the end zone, it’s that you get to KEEP the ball after you fumble it out of bounds at all! New rule - ball fumbled…

Not to pile on, as everyone is jumping down your throat (a little harsh!) but the Timex Weekenders are also SUPER LOUD. Like, annoying to keep on your nightstand loud.

Not to pile on, as everyone is jumping down your throat (a little harsh!) but the Timex Weekenders are also SUPER…

I'm not mad, but...

It's because American sports fans are kinda dumb (gasp!). The obsession with parity in all of our professional sports (except baseball, for the most part) is a pretty good metaphor for our cultural celebration of mediocrity. And every team "deserves" the chance to win, etc, and all we care about are champions. In…

Totally Paul Simon... "Hello locker room my old friend..."