it's a Bloody, buddy

Jaime: "Surrender Riverrun or I'll return you your infant son with a trebuchet."
Edmure: "What's a 'trebuchet'?
Jaime: "It's like a catapult… It's French."
Edmure: "What's 'French'??"
Jaime: "Sigh, a catapult. I'll fling your son out of a catapult."

Arya's Wolverine-style healing factor was something else… Areo Hotah: drops dead from one jab of a lil baby snickersnee.
Arya: savagely stabbed in the guts half a dozen times, is up & doing acrobatics after some soup & a power nap. If only Lady Crane had been at the Red Wedding to tend to Talisa…

"Ten bannanaaaa cream piiiiiiiiiiiiies!"

Tyrion: "So I once brought a jackass & a honeycomb into a brothel…"
Missandei: "Yes, & then what happened?"
Tyrion: "The Blackfish died off-screen."
Grey Worm: "This is worst joke I have ever heard."

SWEAGEN!!!
The Night is Dark & full of Cock Sucka!!!

There's still time for Darkstar to show up in all his of the night glory…

It really doesn't do the character justice, or even make him interesting, to just cut out everything that made him notable… Instead of a HellHorn wielding badass that trips on warlock wine & maybe (?) has some cool mystery about one of his eyes we've got… a guy. Just some guy. Oh well, maybe it gets cooler… idk, I'm…

No Dragonbinder? Fine, fuckit, alright… No shade-of-the-evening warlock lips? Well…aw fuckit, alright… No eye-patch though? Come on! Now it's like he's just another snarkybeard jerkface… like a scruffier Daario…

"We can't risk Ramsay intercepting a raven Brienne, it's got to be you. Only you possess the requisite inconspicuousness."

the Sparrow movement in the books just seemed to make more sense, like, these smallfolk have just lived through hell & have nothing to lose anymore, just carve/paint 7-pointed stars on yourself & it's in the gods hands now…it just felt like a more natural outcome, like something that could really happen in the midst…

don't you mean Burning Man?
*ducks*

Littlefinger: "The time has come for the Lords of the Vale to join the fray."
next week SweetRobin & the Lords of the Vale show up at The Twins to swear alliance w Lord Walder, mutual confusion ensues, everybody dies.

::Sam gets to Oldtown, meets Alleras the Sphinx… Dies.::

Glowing like sunset, a red sword was raised in the hand of a blue-eyed king who cast no shadow

in the direction of "fuck this, this what Sansa escaped Joffrey for? fuck Dontos, fuck Littlefinger, fuck the Tyrells, fuck Harry the Heir, & if they fuck up the Umbers totally… fuck, send in some Royces

going heavy in debt to some no rep Norvoshi bank here, but all muh quarters on 30-1
a simple bet for a simple man.
double or nothin they go full bluelipped shade of the evening…

"Hey, this episode is defective."
*another episode springs leak, & another*
"These episodes are all defective!"

That was pretty sweet, & I'm as big a fan of the awesome duel-wield as anyone, but where was Dawn? I'd have liked to get a look, maybe a little cool starmetal backstory about the actual Sword of the Morning…

It's just nerdrage on my part… Sure Rickon & Shaggydog haven't been major players so far, but they were out there, waiting… Rickon was going to return from Skagos as the most savage Stark in 1000 years, & after obliterating their enemies w the help of his master assassin & master Machiavellian sisters, was going to be…