The world needs more Death Becomes Her gifs.

What, do you work for CNN? That baby is obviously fake.

Only one actor can successfully inhabit the role of Linda Tripp — no need for a long, drawn out search. Even if they cast someone else, this is the only person I will see on screen...

You know, I wish people would just leave Monica Lewinsky alone.

She buys me a Porsche after I express interest in getting one but know I can’t (she does put the title in her name). She buys me a membership to the exclusive Sherwood for somewhere around $200,000 so I can play golf.

Eh, I’m not mad at the Kardashians for being upset at Caitlyn here. Long before Caitlyn and Kris broke up, there were numerous things on for years about how Caitlyn (then Bruce) basically spent herself into near bankruptcy on stupid stuff. Even Caitlyn talked about this openly—- specifically how Kris basically saved…

Damn, they play rough! Their own mother!

I think they’re talking about the class of 2020, last year’s freshman class.

I’ve liked her sometimes and I was willing to side with her until this. No one is bullying her. She is facing the consequences that come with free speech. CNN is not obligated to employ her, those casinos don’t have to give her a venue and people can decide this is too much. I wish this had been a mock press…

I saw Kathy Griffin interviewed on a late night show — I think it was Seth Meyers — a few years ago, and her main anecdote was about the time she ran into someone she’d said horrible things about on Fashion Police, and that person had the gall to let her know they were unhappy with her comments. Griffin was deeply…

I would be happy just to know who is replying to whom half the time.

If you’re wondering how the roll out for Katy Perry’s new album is going:

About how all of their friends had records of plastic surgery stolen, right? Heaven knows none of the Kardashians have had any.

I hope she was drunk off a Bronfman product. If I recall the Bronfmans made all their money bootlegging Canadian whiskey into Prohibition-era America. The Bronfmans gave us Hannah Bronfman, so negative points, but also the Seagram Building, one of the finest examples of postwar modern architecture on earth.

I watched Hannah Bronfman drunkenly run into a wall at a party in high school. She later got kicked out for smoking pot on a class trip.

I’ve done Murph a couple times (no vest), and I think my best time ever was around 55 minutes. For comparison, I can run a mile in 5:30, two miles at 13:00 without feeling particularly winded, rock climb regularly at V4s pushing to V5s, and oh yeah, I played in the fucking NFL.

My parents aren’t even divorced and that’d be good to know.

Just for fun, I’m going to try to explain this story to my mom.