If you’re calling people assholes because they don’t give a reason why they won’t go out with you, I can think of at least one right now.

Chalkboard story: My dad grew up on a goat farm in the Colorado Rockies. Abject poverty. He was unusual in that he had a lust for knowledge so he started reading every book the local town library had. By 18, he had read everything related to science he could get his hands on. His grades reflected his obsession. A…

Vote: Haiku Deck

Semi-professional ultimate frisbee player (I wish I was joking). He also wore a backpack all the time filled with some weights to help his "explosiveness"...he was attractive though! He also accused my cats of giving him mono. You read that correctly.

I fucked the groundskeeper in the garden shed of the church next door to my house. He was hot in a Vincent D'Onofrio Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead kind of way. He was 6'4" and muscular but a little soft around the middle, with a hairy butt and a girthsome dick. He had thick hair and long eyelashes. He bent me…

So I was banging this guy for like a year who was pretty shocking. On our second 'date' he invited me round for dinner - a concoction of meat fried with bananas which we ate in his bed out of a shared salad bowl because obviously. He used to get blind drunk, lost, and just come to mine at 3am ish every month or so.…

the guy who worked at an electronics store. His name was Eric Johnson but went by Lance at work. He said there was another Eric there and they couldn't have two, so he chose Lance. Lance Johnson. My friends and I referred to him as Penis Penis.

His name was Javier and I met him when I worked at the bookstore in college. He was super hot, but that's because all he cared about in the world was his body. Good for him! Good for him. But between working out and moisturizing and hair care and trimming and and and, there was...not much left. But super hot and…

Young lady approached me on the bus—

This ballerina dude who was in charge of "gospel dance" at his new age-y church. When we were done, he rolled off, and put a handmade hemp bracelet on me with five different colored beads.

I have slept with so many embarrassing people. I made a lot of poor decisions in my late teens/early 20s. I lost my virginity to a 16 year old drug dealer when I was 18. And then I slept with him again a couple weeks later because I thought it might make me feel like it was a thing and not just a truly horrible idea.…

At Best buy the best day to shop was either Wed (market reactions) or sun ( ad mistakes)