Why should he change his name? It’s the other guy that sucks.

Obviously the blue part here is the land.

My brother earlier this week said “You know what commercial is the worst?” and all I said was “WHAT’S A COMPUTER?” We had never watched the commercial at the same time together, but I knew exactly what commercial he was thinking of.

But really. “What’s a computer?” Either she’s a Mole Woman or being a condescending little bitch to a woman who she probably sees daily hears every selfishly loud argument she has with her parents through those thin walls.

And of course her name is Scout, too (you see it when she virtually “signs” her friend’s cast).

Do you not watch live sports? There is no way to avoid commercials with live sports. Even the ESPN app has some commercials in between that doofy music they play with the hold screen.

Ha same here!

Exactly! Find the people who made this commercial, encase them in a block of cement with Ajit Pai, and offload them in the middle of the fucking ocean. The Arctic Ocean at that. No one will ever bother to recover their remains then.

That ad really pisses me off. Don’t pretend you don’t know what a computer is, you little fucker!

That Apple iPad girl? She’s lying. She knows what a computer is. Don’t play dumb with me, little girl. Typing away on an iPad in a Brooklyn backyard is sucky and you know it. Get a real laptop.

I think he somehow misread the question. If it was “Which QB do you want to go 41/56 for 450 yards 2 TD and still lose?”

Stafford, no brainer.

Jesus. I’m a Lions and by extension a Stafford fan, but good god if I could choose between Stafford and Wilson, even I’d pick Wilson. How is that even in any realm of possibility a choice? He’s actually been to fucking Super Bowls! Anyone who makes a take as stupid as Benoit needs to be fired out of a cannon into the…

They’ll run more and tackle harder but have less ball skills and attacking intelligence. Just depends on what you want in a footballer I guess.

Starlet: a young movie actress being coached and publicized for starring roles 

You know what they say about PED testing: if you get caught, lie like the Dickens.

No, dude. Patrick Swayze only did pot, and not even the drug kind.

I was always puzzled that Sporting Kansas City was not playing Erik Palmer-Brown much at all when he was garnering attention from top division clubs in Italy, Portugal and the Netherlands.

Not sure what’s “inadvertent” about his remarks. He’s choosing to go play in a better league instead of riding the pine in a lesser league. Pretty straightforward.

there’s literally no way to fix this in america, and I don’t even know if I want it to be fixed. I value kids having normal childhoods more than I value seeing the US do well at the world cup

Dusty wasn’t deliberately overusing his pitchers, he just sometimes let his standing micronaps turn into actual naps, and no one noticed.