What in the fuck is he thinking trying to fight Mayweather Jr. It's not like he has a prayer at winning, so I really do not see an upside to doing it. 

Not that I have personal experience or anything, but a solid blow to the crotch of a woman will usually drop her pretty fast, too. They're highly sensitive areas for both sexes. 

Florida: The syphillitic dick of the continental United States.

Doth protest too much.

I see what you did there. 

I assume he’s taking about China, but even in China, counterfeiting (money) hasn’t been punishable by death since 2015 (thankfully).

China removed counterfeiting (money) as a capital punishment in 2015.

Not unless your willing to pay 75% more for your meals, I'd imagine. 

This Maytag we’ve got has been pretty good, and it’s much quieter than any other dishwasher I’ve ever used, but its also fairly new, so I imagine that has something to do with it.

As long as you know where those fingers have been, I suppose. 

That’s.... actually a perfect half-stolen slogan.

The towel’s not going to magically suck all the vapor in the air into it, especially once it cools down. 

Huh, didn’t know Bosch made dishwashers. I’ve used their power tools, and they’ve always been pretty good.

That's the spirit. 

I was under the impression the Nike swish was still visible, so yeah, that’s a little different if so. 

Me and the missus ordered 5 guys a few weeks ago for delivery, it took about 15 for it to arrive and there was definitely some issues with the sogginess of the burgers and their buns. Other than that, the fries were passable, though not great.

Please, do. 

Oh it’s wonderful, and I’m not a big bourbon person either.

They’re not, they’re using Nike’s shoes to make them. If they were making a brand new product, we wouldn’t be having this conversation.

But then he’d just have blasted off again, potentially into the side of a building, and nobody wants to have to clean that up.