If I can’t watch a movie with a drink in my hands, I ain’t watching that movie.

I've heard good things about Green Mountain, so I’ll have to keep that in mind for when I finally do decide to upgrade.

I was thinking about a pellet, but I’ve had issues with the feeders in them and smokers before, the mechanical parts in them just like to shit the bed on me.

The missus has received more than a handful of PayPal phishing emails that have been very official looking, so I can understand where the article is coming from.

Yes.

This exactly. 

They won’t.

Aye, I miss having a propane grill. I have several fire boxes for wood chips still from when I did, but it gave out on us a while back. We got the charcoal as a last minute thing when we were hosting a bunch of people back in ‘17.

Grilling is something that I love to do, when I’m doing it.

“Wow. What an entirely satisfying and engaging endgame these developers have delivered.”?

Emperor Parton does have a nice ring to it. 

My favorite flavor text:

Because that’s the only form of power they don’t have.

Probably because PC's do other things besides play video games. 

Not mine, but my mom’s when she was working at a diner a looong time ago.

Not that this is news to you, but that guy wasn't your friend. 

It took me months of combing through the small, register adjacent refrigerated units full of the “named” Coke bottles to finally find my own and the missus’ names.

Oh God, no. Thankfully we all work well together and so far (after more than a decade with the same people), we havent ever had an issue like that.

It particularly sucks when you run a guild populated almost entirely with personal friends you’ve known for years.