If anyone ever asked me about my early life girlfriends, the only thing I’d be eager to say is that they’re lovely people, and the fact that we’re no longer together shows how wise they were. Don’t go into specifics, be self-deprecating and complimentary.

Proves even more of what a nob he is. Both breathing and sexual arousal are controlled by autonomic functions, there is no urge unless there is a scarcity. You don’t feel the need to breathe until you’ve stopped breathing for some reason, and you don’t feel an “urge” for sex until after your autonomic system has sent…

Sounds like they’re really just made that neckbeard Jody Barrett passed up an opportunity to step on two people of color AND a woman. Missed opportunity.

Thanks, old-timey J.K. Simmons.

This. In their heads, there must be something flawed or sinful about the people it happens to, and that certainly isn’t how they would describe themselves, ever. Meanwhile the rest of us schleps question our own value, which makes it easy for these narcissists to point at us and say “See, you’re broken, that’s why…

Damn, that was good Kinja.

What does “retire” even mean in the context of people who make their living streaming? This is like saying someone “retired” from their college job when they went to work for the first time as an adult. They’re not retired, they’re working elsewhere, probably in the same industry in another role.

This right here. The Spanish economy has always been a bit of an opportunistic grift, pouncing on successful people it suddenly realized it could squeeze more money out of. I lived in Spain during the transition to the Euro (New Year’s Day, 2002). Many of the European nations brought idiosyncratic financial and legal c…

I thought Quantumania was more of a metaphor for passing the torch from an older generation that was willing to make compromises to get along in society to a younger one that was willing to fight injustice no matter the cost, and I thought they hit us over the head pretty strongly with that metaphor, but whatever.

One of the very best things about getting a few decades older is that I’m not afraid to say “Tell me what you like and what you don’t like”, and my partner isn’t afraid to answer honestly. That fucking song and dance routine young people did when I first started dating as they either try to convince their partners…

Can’t wait to get sandwiches in which the meat which got splashed with the blood of workers who can’t work the slicers properly has been only casually rinsed off so they don’t have to explain to the manager why they threw it out.

What if I don’t care that my penis is small, and I just like to go fast?

I have, it’s part of his stand-up that I grew up with. My take on it was it was supposed to come off as a man who is just as intimidated by his wife as his children are, an over-the-top caricature rather than to be taken at face value.

In fairness to the rapist (?!), he didn’t invent that take on parenting. Culturally, the Mom was the authoritarian in the parenting unit, and the Dad had the option of being either bumbling good guy or the absentee breadwinner. He clearly thought the bumbling good guy was better fodder for standup. Knowing now what we…

I never bought into Tim Allen, but I sure did get on the Cosby bandwagon. I had all his stand-up on cassette, I was a huge fan of the show. One of the few times I bought in to the hype only to discover how wrong I was after the fact. I’m usually more suspicious and critical.

I mean, I’d take that if it didn’t come with all of the baggage it inevitably comes with. Homophobia, misogyny, substance abuse, mental illness, etc. etc. find fertile hiding ground in that sort of behavior. It’s healthier just to be open and genuine with your friends, without any protective affectations.

You have correctly assessed the situation, they are once again trying to take something good and weaponize it into something oppressive.

A buddy of mine who worked in military Intelligence told me he maintained one vice, a chosen one that was a manageable and permissible peccadillo, on the theory that if a routine clearance investigation didn’t turn up anything they would just dig deeper. It must have worked for him, he ran in some pretty rarified…

It’s tough, picking your role models. I grew up in the ‘70s and ‘80s, my prime was during the ‘90s, and I think I didn’t realize until the 2000s how fucked up my idols were. Better to have good principles to stand for than to have heroes to emulate.

100% believable. I never got why people thought of him as “America’s Dad” just because he played a father on a popular show. Dude’s always been a skeeze.