Don’t forget the blueberry-flavored lube!

I am all kind of nerves for the colonial overtones I am sensing in the new Tarzan trailer. “He was civilized, but then he went back to da jungle and went completely APESHIT SAVAGE”. Harumph, Hollywood.

That sonnet?!? Oh my goodness, all the rain on my face.

I am going into the final year of my PhD and I’ve only recently been able to finalize my topic (with no help from my supervisor, who is verbally abusive and emotionally manipulative). But now I’m trying to write chapter summaries that will explain how I’m conceptualizing* my thesis and I’m freaking out because my…

I am not this person, but this tweet wins the internet:

You’re the only hope for early grammatical indoctrination! Don’t give up on them now or else I’ll be the one to deal with them when they’re/their/there in their/there/they’re early twenties! And they get a lot mouthier in college. Slap some sense into ‘em while they’re young!

I just need a quick vent before I drown my sorrows in cats and ‘special’ granola. I am a teaching fellow at the local university and I just finished marking two classes worth of papers. When did students stop learning/caring about grammar? It is absolutely infuriating to read their grammatical abominations. In a…

You’re absolutely right - his waist training is out of control.

You forgot your camera at home? ASKING FOR IT. If you brought your digital body cam and the batteries run out? ASKING FOR IT. Left the lens cap on? ASKING FOR IT. Don’t even get me started on your outfit...

Oh em gee. I am always telling my students that they’ve got to toss a sentence because it’s a word salad. No wonder they’ve been giving me some serious side-eye.

This looks like where they filmed Brokeback Mountain. COWBOIZZZ ROLLEPLAAYYYYYY.

What did she say to Lindy, Goddess of My Cold Black Heart? I’ll shred her.

It was one part go-go-gadget tongue and it was one part BC’s eager response to the mouth dagger. Bleach my eyes, gods.

Also, there were rumours that Amanda Bynes was a big fan of Blac Chyna’s look before any K-Klan squabbles (katastrophes?) kame kalling.

I am a research coordinator in Ontario, Canada who is studying the experience of healthcare practitioners with disabilities. Nurses are the only group with whom I have not been able to gain access. As I understand it, Ontario nurses who disclose anything that might affect their ability to work could be penalized at…

Ladies, why not just rip out your husband’s eyeballs? It will save him from having to make eye contact... ever. Sexy times or otherwise. That’s just as logical, amirite?

All I came here to say was “he has a type”. And it is attractive, leggy blondes. #nohate

When I found my baby boy at the shelter, he was all bandaged up and just out of surgery - somebody had stuck fish hooks in all along his upper/lower lips and in his paws. He could barely meow with all that gauze in his cute little mouth and he limped for the first few months. And now he jumps on all things whilst…

My cat “bathes” with me. And by “bathes” I mean he tries to jump into the toilet while I’m peeing. Cats, amirite? Can’t live with them, definitely can’t get any private bathroom time.

I was going to say horizontal-monster-mashing. But boning, too.