You should use your mind for things other than sports analytics. Go invent a mini-plane I can drive to work.

Or just go man, maybe they’ll cut you

I’ve been thinking about the whole Kyrie thing. I’ve heard stories that a lot of professional athletes actually hate playing in the playoffs because they don’t get paid for it like they do in the regular season.

This might be one of those rare times when grownups and professionals joining in on a meme from the teens works out to everyone’s benefit

You’d keep your asshole clenched too if you were indiscriminately fucking that many people.

Why are you censoring “fuck” on the internet?

Aren’t they just trying to make a joke out of him tearing his shirt off and running all around the pitch, referencing the scene from Old School where Will Ferrell is streaking and running through the streets naked? He asks is wife “Do you think KFC is still open?” The intent seems pretty harmless in this case.

Harper Jerked 9th Longest Dong in 2017 MLB Season

“No I’m not high or drunk I just want to play more football.”

More lame: this new caste system of commenting (“Staff,” “Community,” “Pending,” “Eternally Grey,” “Untouchables”...)

You may not be able to get the Rockets for that price, but I’m betting it would make you pretty competitive in the Marlins bidding.

Maybe he’s just trying to pay back his student loans.

Nothing inspires confidence quite like a billionaire liquidating assets.

I’m an idiot and cannot figure how to post a video.

Come on, it’s just locker room talk.

But according to The Root, we’re supposed to be rooting for Mayweather because McGregor is a racist. What do we do now?

The press tour is a disaster.

Should we make him our friend too?

I save my good shit for reddit?

No it’s cool because I heard in the comments that Irish people were discriminated against and enslaved too.