It's okay friend, sit by me and I can be awake for the both of us.

Nooooo, haven't you ever seen Martin? From the 90s? When he would go "Daaaayum Gina!"?

Can someone just chew mint gum and blow on my vagina? Tnks

I do have real moisturizer, which, like my conditioner, is a remnant of an ex-girlfriend who used it religiously and would not go a night without it. I tried using it to masturbate once, obviously, but I would not recommend it:

I hate myself for reading his name as Hide DeSalami.

Little Ditty with Jo and dying.

“Excuse me a second. Hold on a second. I resent that remark because I do have a bottom. It’s a first-class bottom and the best you’ve ever seen, let me tell you. My bottom is so great. It is! Some have even told me that I have a power bottom. That’s right! A power bottom. It’s something my beautiful daughter Ivanka…

That’s my Senator! And not yours!! I shook her hand in Porter Sq. when she was running against Scott Brown in 2012. I was so surprised she was there I couldn’t think of anything to say tho. My big mouth failed me when it counted.

Everything is going to seem that way for a little while until the trauma wears off.

Never forget!

I’ll follow so I can get you out when I see you, but the rest is up to “The Powers That Be”.

What the fuck happened to VH1? I so miss Flavor of Love, Charm School, I Love Money...all their great trainwrecks. I like Love & Hip Hop but it doesn’t come close to the greatness that was classic VH1.

So, this...

Would it make you happy to know that he played a set at a club I worked at in 2008 and approximately 25 people showed up? It was mostly because at that time, nobody seemed to know who he was, but still.

I really dislike him. The fact that he, Skrillex, and Justin Bieber worked on a song together just amazes me because I didn’t know so much douche could fit into one studio.

Now I miss Rebecca Rose. :(