no kidding. Exley is a total by-the-book try-hard, which is like the opposite of McConnaughey

I thought the saying was, “Because of drinking my liver has spots.”?

The Lions took a good look at what Baltimore did with Flacco. The Ravens signed a marginally capable QB who needed good talent around him in order to thrive, to such an overwhelmingly large contract that they couldn’t afford to surround him with any good talent at all. They then spent the next 5 years watching him…

Oregano. Not even once.

I actually feel for the Biebs (which shocks me) - he has worked all his life, he must be missing, I don’t know, a childhood or something? Regular experiences such as school?

Is that how bad the show is these days that this episode is considered “uniformly funny?” I found much of it cringe worthy and flat out embarrassing. 

“This is my show. I let you in here sometimes.”

The ghostly, bloody truck idling outside? That was and forever will be THE BEST Jezebel Scary Story there ever was!

Abdication would never happen. The last one rocked the monarchy and its repercussions went on to be felt for many years post event. It’s without a doubt in my mind that Charles will take the throne if/when his time comes. Of the two options, Charles becoming King is the least damaging. Abdication = more conversations…

I was hoping for this review to include some comment from Phil - former chief accountant at Gawker about how the fallout of that whole thing that happened lead him on a path of Darkness. Or at least some joke about Dominic Burgess going to the Bad Place now. He must got tired of positive thinking in after all the…

A car and driver on call. Because I can’t drive (nor am allowed to due to eye problems) and the idea that there’s someone there to drive you everywhere feels like the total luxury to me. 

I think her comedic talent was underused in that show. 99% of her screen time was about being pretty and dumb, but the few times she actually got some good material to work with, she was HILARIOUS

It’s a new Gilded Age in America brought on by late-stage capitalism.

They’re gross with their over the top spending. Everything can be bought, everything is disposable and nothing has any value

I’m a poor, so I don’t know the rich handle things, but why wouldn’t Kris just buy herself her dream car if she already has the money? I don’t get it. What was she waiting for? These people buy each other cars every 6 days, but are always being chauffeured. I think if I had Kardashian /Jenner money, I would be happy…

The Kardashians like their cars like they like their man: Over-the-top, too fast, and ready to trade-in after a year.

I know people are free to do whatever they like with their money, but this ostentatious spending by the Kardashians really irritates me. It’s vulgar and gross, especially when you do it for show.

“Banks Violet Bair” Awww little Banksy.

He likes the smell of her in the morning?

Yup yup yuppity yup. I think that might have been the first ever winner? Also came from the long-ago pre-Kinja time when the Jez community was smaller and more connected, “knowing” (in the Internet sense) the author made it that much creepier.  That damn bloody truck....shivers.