Tangled Legs; Didn’t Run

For some reason I expected a love triangle to be part of the story and now I'm disappointed. This is like freshmen year roommate level of intrigue.

And this is why Michael Jackson couldn’t win a race: unlike Bolt, he preferred to come in a little behind.

Is this what they mean when they say that on field chemistry is so important in the NFL?

What the fuck is the point of bullfighting?

if Riley made certain personnel decisions, or if James altered his game in certain ways, it was for the mutual benefit of all.

In a literal fight between a bunch of warriors and a bunch of baby cows, who would win? Don’t be so quick to say the group of warriors would do it. The Rock has some pretty big calves. And sometimes, a calf will bite you. Also, why won’t this headache go away? And why does it smell like burning feathers?

Today in Alternate Future History:

*Take requires oven mitts for safe handling*

At least for me, I’ve spent much of the past few years hoping and hoping Roger would regain his dominance... now that it’s clear he won’t I’m starting to appreciate Djok more and more... he was just painting lines all day yesterday, it was something to watch.

Single here, mind if I play through?

Soon this league will be virtually unrecognizable. A power forward the size of a single proton? OK, pal, but not on my watch!! Do you think a wing player should be no larger than a down quark so that he can exploit the laws of physics to travel the potato through the objective circle? NEITHER DO I MY FRIEND BECAUSE I…

Appropriate as NFL defenses will be greeting Cousins with arms wide open all season long.

There is a lot of other interesting stuff in the complaint, like Walters allegedly using “Dallas Cowboys” as the code name for Dean Foods ...

You know, I have no idea who this is or what this picture means, but holy shit it’s awesome.

This is the face of a sorcerer that managed to summon a dragon to wreak vengeance on his enemies, but he didn’t actually expect the spell to work.

From now on, when I don’t watch basketball, I will assume basketball really is…

For some people, it's about the journey. For others, the destination.

I did the same and even parlayed it into sex by saying how great it’d be to have such a cute kid. Jokes on her though, after years of treating my body like a truck stop toilet, my boys have the mobility of Andy Reid trying to run through a pool of sand.

Al Horford added that his team “wouldn’t do anything like that,”

It is a little too late for the Hawks to start getting defensive about Game 2.

Just like the boobs on Fox, this one, too, is lily-white and far to the right.