Right. And if you’re eating a salad with lots of good things in it, like avocado, you’re probably replacing other heavy, fatty foods. Unless you’re chomping a green salad with avocado and THEN eating your whole pizza.

Right. Even with ranch, I don’t think anyone is getting fat from that. Unless they’re dipping fried cheese into it, or using for a salad made mostly of fried chicken.

My office fridge has approximately 100000000 bottles of dressing, many of which are low cal, low fat, no fat, etc. Blech. Once I stopped buying dressing and starting mostly using olive oil and vinegar or lemon with honey, dijon, feta, etc., which takes two seconds to make, I couldn’t go back. It tastes gross now.

I also feel like people get a little overexcited about dressing being so awful for you. I’m eating fucking salad, most of which has very little calories, so that tablespoon of olive oil is not going to kill me. It’s not like, salad is good for you, so it must be calorie and fat free. If it’s my lunch, it better have…

I have zero problem with it. Mine are so young— the deal currently is that I can and will read their texts. The purpose of their phone is to communicate with us. If they use it to talk with friends, I see it. That will go on another year or two at least. No social media allowed until 13, not even instagram. Go play…

My husband has a phd in electrical engineering and he’s like fuck if I know, how did I become the household IT admin?

Ugh that’s awful, I’m sorry. It explains so much about some people though. I didn’t even really know that was a thing.

The ones I like know I swear a lot. My favorite one, who just moved away (dammit), became my favorite when she plopped down and declared that another mom volunteering in the art program was a cunt. But I have one friend— the mom of my kid’s BFF— who does not swear at all and it’s freakish. She’s nice and all, but…

We had the kitchen-only family computer, but then they “need” an ipad in 6th grade. Great. I don’t want to prohibit my son (and next year, my daughter as well) from doing homework in his room— that seems stupid, and I just bought him a desk for in there. It has restrictions on it, but still. And yea, the friends is a…

Probably. Some of them I know are just really bland to begin with.

I have to rewrite all my emails to include the requisite level of syrupy sweet. I know one (very lovely sweet) mom who ends every email with Have a GREAT day! She is a genuinely nice person but how am I supposed to talk shit with a chick like that?

Me too, although mostly I want to stop them from going to adult content websites, as opposed to knowing after the fact that they did. They’re 10 and 11, they don’t need to see a lot of what’s out there. But apparently I’m a “bad parent” because I’m not standing over them 24/7 while they’re on the computer. ??

This woman I’m thinking of is really nice and everyone loves her, but she creeps me out slightly. Or at least I just don’t feel comfortable around her. She talks like she’s from 1957. Better after a few drinks though— aren’t we all.

WTF is a COGIC? And can I please smack the next person who puts #blessed on anything? In particular, this one woman I know who is “blessed” by having remarried a creepy 50-something zillionaire. So she posts photos of her new house that she’s building and adds “#blessed?” Bitch, you think God gave you that? Maybe God…

Creepy as hell. It’s also really common among suburban moms as far as I can tell. And I don’t fit in because I am NOT sweet.

Have I seen Inside Out???!!!! Hell yea!!! I have a 10 year old daughter and an 11 year old son. I will lose my shit just thinking about it.

Because War on Christmas? I don’t fucking know!!! I can’t even look at that woman the same way now.

I don’t know how you go anywhere or do anything with four kids under the age of what, like 5? With no job and no education.

This explains so much. Where I live, fundamentalism is not common at all. But I’ve noticed a similar kind of thing with some very religious acquaintances. Happy smiling all the time, soft-spoken and ultra feminine always, everything is love and blessed. Facebook posts of a painting featuring Santa Claus and Jesus in…

I’m with you, but as one of the main people who decides stuff like this, it gets hard— so often they’re not actually threatening, and the weird writings contain allegations of unlawful conduct by others along with a bunch of general weirdness— so it’s like they’re a whistleblower. Puts us in an odd situation. We just…