He used Google Translate for accuracy.

I hope Huma finally leaves him after the election.

it’s a small thing, but i’m sure he’s going there to lend a hand.

Larry already has a show in production called “Insecure” with Issa Rae.

Would rather have seen Trevor Noah go.

“Bonjour, bleedypuss!”

I want to crowdsource a question I have about chelsea’s “process.”

What do you mean “but with?”

Even if he was an affirmative action admission all it would prove is that affirmative action kicks ass and is worth the investment, because we got Barack Freaking Obama out of it.

I just want this list to be a daily thing... Because tracking the Donald’s fuckwittery has replaced Game of Thrones theory crafting, whether our cats seem weird today and “Should we buy or build?” As my marriage’s number one conversation topic.

He's like the drunk who, upon hitting rock bottom, decides to give heroin a try, hits rock bottomer, then starts freebasing coke, hits rerock bottom, moves onto crack, and then proceeds to smoke meth to see what's below rock bottomest.

What, I thought conservatives liked it when politicians “tell it like it is” and “speak their mind”? Or is that not the case anymore

He can’t handle the Ruth.

It’s just the Redskins’ cheerleaders with his name on them in gold sequins, chanting, “Hey hey, ho ho, those frowning faces got to go, hey hey, ho ho, you got bootstraps so earn some dough.”

Mosquitos come here and spread disease and bite people, and some, I assume, are good insects.

Reality is now sketch comedy, folks.

That is a detailed and nuanced position. I love that the first “issue” on his page is a defense of Trump University.

I’ve thought about this and realized that it can be both. I believe he thinks his daughter is an exceptional woman (and not just the whole “if she wasn’t my daughter I’d...” bit of effluvia). I believe he encouraged her. Because she’s his. And that alone makes her exceptional by virtue of those yugely great genes. But…

They killed their child. They have several other children. The family makes their living by selling these snake oil cures and have been vocally unrepentant about killing their own son and trying to publicly persuade idiots like you that they were just well-meaning fuckups when they murdered their child by neglect and…

I would hit it like a Jeopardy buzzer. Over and over again. I'll take Walk of Shame for 1,000, Alex.