22 Jump Street?

One of Elliott Kalan's letters songs?

Oh right. Probably not a deep-fryer, then, which is a shame because that's what he would have wanted.

I called in to request Passenger 57, because I love '90s airplane action movies.

This week, We Hate Movies takes on the whitest of white guy karate movies: American Shaolin! Trevor Gottitall does indeed have it all, Jim Belushi is Fat Ghost, and George Bush doesn't approve, Bar.

Steve Buscemi and an unfortunate hooker getting attacked by an enraged Shep Proudfoot in Fargo. Man, that scene is uncomfortable.

Chadwick is the Jeb Bush of the Secret Empire.

Okay, let's see what this article's abo -

That's how it works!

The Worst of 2015 reaches the kill screen as We Hate Movies tackles Pixels! Kevin James is President Meatball Sub, Dan Aykroyd is angling for some product placement, and Josh Gad is definitely having sex with Q*Bert. Also this week: a truly harrowing Mail Bag. For god's sake, people, do not try to hold it in.

Yeah, I mean, there are two possibilities here - the old people are crazy, and they'll kill you if you don't follow the rules, or the doll is actually alive/evil/possessed, and will kill you if you don't follow the rules. Just do the job, get paid, and don't get stabbed to death by a action figure.

Well, fun for us. Them, not so much.

RIPD The Goobs.

It also has some really creepy misogyny, but it's so damn entertaining.

And tonight, Worst of 2015 starts! Oh yeaaaaaaah! Oh yeaaaaaaaah! Oh yeaaaaahhhhh…

It's weird that they've never actually done a Nick Nolte movie. I figure they'll get to Ang Lee's Hulk eventually.

No, not his father-in-law, the old Australian dude who buys and then marries his mom.

This week: sick of Star Wars yet? Well TOO BAD, because We Hate Movies attacks Attack of the Clones! Anakin is a creep, his stepdad is a space pervert, and Elan Sleazebaggano should really go home and rethink his life and his dumb name.

Well, now I do want his father to show up, and he's just big angry space Nazi Brendan Gleeson.

Yeah, it was mostly a slam on Heigl, but Under Siege 2 is totally watchable. Sure, none of the villains are as enjoyable as the Jones/Busey ham sandwich of the original (Eric Bogosian gives it the old college try), and it could really have used Erika Eleniak, but if it's on TV, I'll tune in.