When I was in college, my favorite restaurant just had a big sign behind the register that said “We reserve the right to deny service to assholes.”

I can’t speak to outlets’ decision on what and what not to cover, but the terms Ted Cruz himself has laid out for us all is that what would seem to be personal family matters (whether, when, and under what circumstances to have children, what recreational activities to take your children to, what medical care to…

This poor kid’s situation is fucked from all angles. Her dad’s a well-known POS and, if it’s true she’s bi-sexual, I can only imagine how that’s going to go down in that household. Part of me loves what is happening to Mr. Cruz while the logical and realistic part of me only worries for that child and how she has to…

I mean, if “provides gender affirming care to trans children in consultation with a doctor” is sufficient evidence of abuse to take people’s children from them and throw them in jail, Cruz probably deserves the death penalty for this.

Don’t forget that:

Oh how sweet. The GOP finally realized that Walker’s little field trip to Crazytown needed to be supervised by some adults...and Lindsey and Ted were the only people who didn’t have something better to do.

First, did Stanford ever ask what this football player was doing in public? Why wasn’t he home studying or in class? If he’d been where he was supposed to be, instead of out with his friends, he wouldn’t have gotten coffee spilled on him. Assaults never happen at home or in class, and he should have known that.

This is the most verbose, well-though-out, and obnoxious example of blaming the victim I’ve ever seen. Bravo.

Let’s concede that the school probably couldn’t do nothing about this, but they sure didn’t need to go straight to threatening dismissal from the soccer team and possible complication of her ability to graduate. To me this has one semester of disciplinary probation written all over it. It would also send a message to…

From the same campus that brought you Brock Turner comes this absolute bullshit.

This horrible. I’m sorry for Katie. I’m sorry for Katie’s friend and I’m sorry for Katie’s loved ones. I mean spilled coffee, is a bad? But rape is fine I guess. Women supporting other women is always going to be punished in our society. Now our society has lost a young woman willing to fight back for her teammate and…

Abusers, defenders of that abuse, bullies, and other monsters have destroyed and weaponized the term “forgiveness.”

Who wore it best?

You would think the Iranian government would be more careful about indiscriminately killing protesters since that's what lead to the revolution that the current system used to get in power.

This is a classic wedding family photo sesh situation in which the family all gets in for the “sisters” shot (or what have you), and then the brother with the GF that no one thinks will last pipes up with, WHAT ABOUT MY GIRLFRIEND, SHE’S A SISTER, TOO! Then the girlfriend sheepishly steps into the picture and they all…

Tiff, honey. You married real* money. You didn’t have to get married at Mar-a-Lago.

Say what you will about Grace Kelly’s bitchy, wooden acting style (yes I wanted someone else in the perfect-except-for-her Dial M for Murder) but the woman could wear a dress. Ivanka...just can’t. And what the hell are those shoes? Doesn’t she PAY people to match her shoes to her clothes? Did the reception feature a…

Are you fucking stupid? Here is why Georgia still matters:

Congratulations Nevada,

Frankly, if I were the first-born child of a king and wasn’t first in line to the throne because my younger sibling is male, I’d do whatever the fuck I want too. Fuck that shit.