Yeah, watching bits isn’t really going to give you the flavor of the show, but also, it’s a very specific, rather odd type of humor, which just isn’t going to be everyone’s taste.

lol I was at this party and I saw this one friend reaching for my other friend’s hair. She had this look on her face like “what the hell are you about to do” and I basically screamed NO at him and leapt in front of the perpetrating finger like I was taking a bullet for the president

Uggh. I feel your pain. At least once a month, I find myself standing in line at Target or Starbucks to find someone touching my hair. And yes, one lady at Starbucks once sent her little girl outside to ask if she could touch it. I almost said yes until she said she had to because it reminded her of her dog’s fur.…

I mean, I’d like to touch snow leopards and tigers but do not. Because I value not being torn limb from limb.

STAND THERE IN YOUR WRONGNESS AND BE WRONG.

That's fine. There are a lot of things I want to touch, but do not touch. Just pretend our fluffy hair is made out of lava and will melt your hand off if you touch it.

My hair is a like Reggie’s (a little smaller though). PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH IT! Even if you like it! Even if you think it’s cool! Even if you’ve never seen anything like it!

True story: A dude once ran out of a coffee shop as I was passing it on the street to look at and touch my hair. THIS IS MADDNESS! STOP IT NOW!…

Just a reminder - this is NOT OK! OK?

The only exceptions to this rule is if somebody is actively on fire, about to be hit by a motor vehicle, or has a large, confused bat stuck to them.

Don’t touch other people without permision. Don’t Touch Other People Without Permission. DON’T TOUCH OTHER PEOPLE WITHOUT PERMISSION!

tbh, i’d much rather ask him about his one weird super-long finger nail.

No open bar?!?

Berating Mothers is a subset of Woman Can’t Ever Get It Right. It’s America’s national pastime.

My daughter just turned 21 and she was at Disneyland for her birthday and confessed that she now realizes that I was a saint amongst saints for the endless hours and days and weeks and years I endured her singing and playing Mary Fucking Poppins. I then confessed I used to hide the tape (yes VHS) from her because I…

My Busia and Ciocia Barb used to spend interesting quality time with me. I was an insomniac since I was two (and still am 27 years later) so they would take me out driving downtown and we’d go “looking for Cinderella”. And by that, I mean we’d drive by the drag bars and look at the drag queens and Cioc and Busia would…

One of my favourite parts of Jezebel is coming onto Saturday Night Social and reading all of the wonderful, supportive responses to people in need of just that.

I love these. I really wanted the Hieronymus Bosch ones, too, but didn’t pull the trigger. I recently bought these beauties, though: