Latinas have baby hairs. Get over it.

I was feeling positive until she described her natural hair as ratchet. The appropriation of that word over others bothers me like nails on a chalkboard for some reason.

absolutely ratchet and absurd

No, except they ARE like the mob. They’re more like the mob than they are like a religion. At best, you leave the church and they’ll make everyone you love pretend that you don’t exist. At worst, they kidnap you, kill you, and don’t report you missing for weeks.

So the cult created to dodge taxes cover for founder and serious perv L. Ron Hubbard is back to threatening local businesses to prevent any negative information.

At least the Mormons have good potato salad... Scientology just has John Travolta’s gayness trapped in a phylactery.

You know, both the Scientologists and the Mormons are facing a lot of criticisms lately and they’re both basically Space Jesus cults run by hucksters. I’m thinking a merger is in order.

Austerity is when you stuff your contractors full of pork, give banks massive hand outs, then when poor people ask for help get told there is no money left.

Computers, however, have nothing better to do; keeping track is their only job. They don’t lose the scrapbook, or travel, or get drunk, or grow senile, or even blink. They just sit there and remember.

I’d date Patrick Stewart but that’s about the only guy my grandpa’s age I really feel pants tingles for.

And then, at 46, they grow back down?

reminds me of when my mother was about 70 and some of her friends started dying. I felt she was expecting me to fill her day. I suggested that she join a pensioner group and meet new friends. She declined saying it was full of old people.

No, men have sell-by dates but they’re deluded to think they don’t.

My favorite are the guys who are let's say 50 and it says they are looking for woman 19-29. When they would message me and I'd tell them sorry too old for me and they would tell me age is just a number. So then I asked why they wouldn't date someone their own age and was told they were youthful at heart and spent all…

I mean, sure they do. How many young women do you think would date an 80-year old for his charm or looks alone? Or a 50-year old, for that matter?

My ‘wall’ happened at 27. Before that, I got a few hits (I’m 6’2 so the attention was never more than a few messages a week, mostly spam or gross comments) but when the age changed to 27 pretty much everything stopped, even the gross comments. I met my current dude on okcupid and his was the only message I’d received…

I earn a few extra bucks ghostwriting dating site profiles for paying customers. Most of them are people who’ve had their profiles up for a while, and can’t understand why they’re not working.

My biggest surprise since turning thirty a couple years ago has not been that guys in their forties, fifties and beyond have stopped hitting on me (although, of course, they have) but that they now are openly hostile and angry towards me. My theory about this goes as follows: When I was in my early twenties older men…

I used to get bummed when I wouldn’t match on Tinder with some guy I thought was really good looking, but then it dawned on me: I’m 32. They're probably not even SEEING my profile because they've set their search parameters for women in their 20s.

I just turned 25, should I give up now then?