I totally believe you. Really, I do. You’ve very important. Next time I ask to speak to the assistant manager at a Trader Joe’s, I’ll wonder if I’m speaking with the incomparable Dantoni Spintomato. 

Lol, okay champ. 

Hey now, marginally-better-than-high-school-players-who’s-identity-is-tied-to-being-an-’athlete’-and-will-go-anywhere-to-keep-their-identities-intact beggars can’t be choosers!

Can I agree with you that the salary cap/luxury tax structure is anti-player and be against it, while also believing that removing it would probably kill, or at least greatly damage the popularity of the league?

PLEASE TELL US YOUR THOUGHTS ON FITNESS. I PROMISE WE’LL BE RIVETED. 

That’s what she jizz. Shit, no I mean that’s what jizz said!

The Browns are already on the horn with his agent. 

Exactly! The Eagles have done us all a favor and thoroughly embraced being shit, it’s nice the Packers are doing their best as well. 

This guy’s skillset can transfer, get me on the horn with him!

Poor Raptors fans. They want to believe! They've wanted to for years now! LeBron is gone! Kawaii is healthy and oh yeah he might be the best player in the league. But oh how they have been burned. Their broken hearts chartered to ash. 

Could you imagine trying to put a human inside that thing? Look at the thigh gap! You’d make it 20 yards and want to die of chafing, assuming you could move to begin with. 

Okay, these all look great except for the Bonobos one. Either it's just naturally frumpy or it's a terrible cut for that model, but it's not a good look. 

Okay, these all look great except for the Bonobos one. Either it's just naturally frumpy or it's a terrible cut for…

The rules are not for the Watchers. They are for the Watched. 

I mean, yes in his own words he sexually assaulted a woman, but the dude dropped 81 that one time! He needs to judge our stuff!

Genuinely interested: do people find the crypkeeper section entertaining? After the first one the concept grew stale for me, but I'm just one person. I have greatly enjoyed Grandpa history and terrible local commercial additions this year. 

Skinless chicken breasts have a thicker skin than KD.

That’s all cool, but the problem is there are no saints in this religion. They’re all sinners. Either cover what people are watching, or cover Cabin Racing (Giri’s article tickled me).

This guy here thinks the NFL is uniquely evil in the world of sports. Oh boy, have I got bad news for you...

On the plus side, Everson Griffen is experiencing a mental health episode that threatens his, in order of importance, life, family and career. Really excited for a bird to land on the roof of the Death Star and it collapses. 

That... was an interesting choice.