i bet he’s the type of fellow who talks on the phone in the elevator

Why would they eat shit? Because they can’t get out of their dorms to get real food?

Now that’s some tape Rex Ryan will actually study.

“I can’t believe the awful things people did to their penises last year”

“So wait you’re telling me there’s only one cup for the two girls?”

Five perverts who just saw the HR director walk in with their files.

3:57. Excuse me, sirs, but the nice lady has a theory about the brontosaurus and Mourinho.

Fabulous. I’m looking forward to the Sabres trading up to draft him.

Shout out to Young Drew Magary at 00:30!

the internet was very different (and much less mainstream) pre-net neutrality. we have a lot more to lose now

I thought it was funny how my wife slaved over seating arrangements for a full day. Then I looked at how she did my side, asked her if I could handle that, and divvied that up in about 15 minutes like England drawing borders on an African map.

Currently planning a wedding.

Guess he must have seen something in the game tape.

Asked to explain his 1st interception, Peterman said: “Then, in the distance, I heard the bulls. I began running as fast as I could. Fortunately, I was wearing my Italian cap toe oxfords. Sophisticated yet different; nothing to make a huge fuss about. Rich dark brown calfskin leather. Matching leather vent. Men’s…

I thought the last 10 months would have been sufficient warning about the dangers of replacing a competent black man with an inexperienced and unqualified white guy, but here we are again.

Congratulations on a job.... done.

Oh, P.S., the first twenty-four hours are the worst... Better bring a poncho.

“Oh, Tyrod. The toll road of denial is a long and dangerous one. The price, your soul. Oh, by the way, you have until five to clear out your locker. I’m starting Sunday.”

Dress code is all grays.

I want to see commenters wearing nametags.