Nah, I'm only doing shots from a milk bottle.

Wow that would be a real throwback to the Truman Show: characters slowly figuring out that they live in an artificially scripted world for the entertainment of others…and the Voice of God is Ed Harris again!

Interesting that Ford's new "masked cultists" plot line has them ALL armed with axes and machetes…seems like that would be a lot more dangerous around guests, and override the security rules for non-gun weapons set up in the woodcutter's campfire scene.

That's a lie! St Vincent was martyred by Emperor Diocletian over 1,700 years ago!

I think that was basically the plot of the last Twilight movie.

Like me, when I play Civilization 5!

You know, Eugenics. The science of Eugene Levy.

Yeah, that sounds about right to me! God, The Mummy was just so much fun to watch as a kid - I rewatched it recently and it holds up!

I guess that was my problem - I don't mind dumb movies that are fun-dumb. This one felt dumb, but not silly/campy enough to be fun-dumb.

Wayne Knight/Jeff Goldblum/Samuel L Jackson brought this sort of campy madcap feel to the original. It was terrifying, but the recurrence of these weirdo character actors and their still-quotable catchphrases kept it fun.

Not enough Laura Dern, too much not-Laura Dern.

False: due to a SAG loophole, Chastain was contractually obligated to appear in every movie released in 2015.
That's her in the Indominus Rex motion-capture suit.

Counterpoint: It actually would have been a lot of fun, if it hadn't taken itself so seriously.

If this was written by Nic Pizzolatto:

Yes, they all seem to have synced backstories. Like how Dolores "remembers" Teddy when he comes back to town, and he "remembers" the her daddy doesn't like him. And the sheriff "remembers" the bandit they're hunting for.

"Pissed off libertarian Tim Burton/Hello Kitty/Slipknot fan" is perhaps the most terrifying phrase I've ever read.

Or my favorite, the "Continental Breakfast" skit, which was just a simple pun and goofy character sketch, until it took a sharp right turn into The Shining.

I should check em out! I actually understand French passably enough to make my way through a French movie, maybe missing a few jokes here and there :)

Final showdown in a hidden Nazi compound in a beneath a Borgesian neighborhood of Buenos Aires, hiding a trove of smuggled Renaissance masterpieces.

I really liked Hanks and Rylance - but they're pretty much infallible as actors, no matter what you put them in. And some of the Coens' dialogue was great, because, again they're pretty much ironclad writers.